


Exchanging Fire

by Baird Crevan (LadySibilance)



Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One, Transformers: Shattered Glass, Transformers: War for Cybertron Trilogy (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:59:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 28,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySibilance/pseuds/Baird%20Crevan
Summary: Starscream discovers that Jetfire is actually from a parallel universe that is a mirror opposite of his own.  He decides to enlist help from the mirror dimension to take him down and bring his Skyfire home, only the shuttle is reluctant to leave.  Starscream x Skyfire, former Starscream x SGJetfire, SGJetfire x SGStarscream.
Relationships: Jetfire | Skyfire/Starscream (Transformers), Skyfire/Starscream (Transformers)
Comments: 182
Kudos: 107





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Jetfire to me in War for Cybertron: Siege on Netflix was a bit of a strange hypocrite; so it got me thinking- what if he was actually from the Shattered Glass AU? Suddenly a lot of his behavior might make more sense. Takes place right after the events of TF WFC: Siege. Some G1 elements thrown in with some of my own Shattered Glass fun. :) <3

Starscream sat by his trinemate’s berth as he greyed out into true death. His spark had left some time ago, and now all that was left was the vigil for when Skywarp’s frame truly died as well.

There was a kind of sick parallel here. After the Decepticons were able to regroup after the battle with the Autobots, Megatron had announced at large that not only had they escaped, but they had removed the AllSpark from Cyberton. As Thundercracker and the newly promoted Starscream had been issued a small reprieve to follow the mourning ritual for their trinemate, the first effects of planet death had started to appear. Energon was becoming scarce. Ancient infrastructure of the planet of which they had taken for granted was now turning off permanently. There were rolling blackouts for lights, computers, terminals. Cybertron was slowly fading, just like the colors of the mech before him.

Starscream felt the plaintive embrace of his only surviving trinemate and returned it numbly. Thundercracker buried his face in his neck cabling, hiding a sob. Starscream dimly wondered if the blue seeker would be able to survive the next stage of being a broken trine. It would be difficult. Because of Starscream’s position, they would need to find a new third and none of the prospects filled them with any kind of joy. Acid Storm had been filling in, but he was not a permanent member as he already had a trine. 

He knew Thundercracker was harboring some anger with him for evening suggesting it before Skywarp was even fully grey yet, but Starscream had to be pragmatic of the two of them. They would be in danger of looking weak to Megatron, and he was already far too angry at the state of his army. 

He too felt pain, of course. Pain and loss. But he felt it smolder and feed into his hatred.

Jetfire.

“Do you ever feel like Jetfire came back wrong?” he said, staring off into nothing. 

Thundercracker removed his faceplate from his neck giving him a dark look. He likely didn’t want to talk about the killer of their trinemate, especially at his own _vigil_ , but Starscream only distantly registered the annoyance. It was like all of his own emotions had been dulled and were replaced with just… _Jetfire_.

Thundercrakcer slowly stood and went to sit next to Skywarp on the other side in a chair. He picked up and held the dead one’s knuckles to his lips. “Yes. Ever since he changed his name, if not a little before,” he replied.

Starscream agreed with the timing. Skyfire had disappeared on a small, distant planet while exploring with Starscream when they were on a xenobiology mission as scientists right before the war broke out. Starscream had returned to Cybertron to get help, and a small force of seekers had aided him. They found Skyfire under layers and layers of ice, surprisingly awake, wounded, and quite confused. He had fought them before they could capture them and get him under control. It took some time, but Skyfire eventually got over his traumatic experience, or so it had appeared. Aside from his personality shifting, he also demanded to be called Jetfire now.

At first, Starscream felt excited about the change in Jetfire. He happily joined the Decepticons with him, despite resisting the narrative and actions of the Megatron’s rhetoric for years. He didn’t even mind that the shuttle suddenly decided that he wanted to lead the seekers, and he hadn’t immediately hated that Megatron obliged him. Everyone thought that seekers were too bloodthirsty and rash to be led by their own frame-type, and Jetfire being a skilled aerial was a good choice. 

Things had even begun to be more interesting in the berthroom, where typically Starscream had led and walked the line of pain and pleasure, and now suddenly Jetfire could not be outdone. He had begun to actually hurt Starscream, which he didn’t mind as much as the frag it led to was dangerous and exciting. But then it turned into a ritual. Starscream felt the derisive anger the mech had for him. He didn’t deserve all of it. 

Some of it, maybe. But not all of it. And it got progressively worse.

Starscream was no saint. _Far_ from it. He didn’t mind lying to get what he wanted, and Pit, he was as sadistic as they came. But Jetfire had been so pompous and holier-than-thou, constantly trying to make Starscream into someone he was not. With a bitter look, Jetfire had often said how disappointed he was in the seeker. Starscream, who was hardly prone to fits of doubt, felt rejected for no reason. It hurt.

“We _are_ going to kill him, aren’t we?” Thundercracker asked, his red optics not moving from Skywarp. The question was a loaded one, and Starscream knew it. His relationship with Jetfire was no secret, and even Thundercracker had pieced together that Skywarp’s murder was likely done to hurt his trineleader. He waited for the moment when Thundercracker would blame _him_ for the death of the black and purple seeker, but it was likely something that would happen later.

Starscream frowned. “We are not only going to kill him; we are going to _destroy_ him.”

Thundercracker finally met his optics in the room. They shared an indulgently sadistic grin.

* * *

The question of Jetfire still gnawed at Starscream, and he found he could not recharge later that night. He instead found himself walking the halls of the Decepticon base and even slipping into one of Shockwave’s labs.

He was not strictly _forbidden_ from these labs. His love of science and xenobiology had been interesting pieces of note on his resume when he joined the Decepticon faction, yet they paled in comparison to what Shockwave had to offer. Starscream understood that he was seen more for his frame-type of sky warrior seeker than for his intellect, and for now that was fine. Starscream wanted glory and recognition of course, but he did not mind being underestimated.

No, he wasn’t forbidden from the labs, but Shockwave didn’t like him there. He was dismissive of Starscream’s scientist career at Iacon and took no small effort to put him down in front of Megatron. The warlord had merely rolled his optics; the miner-turned-gladiator-turned-revolutionary didn’t really care for posturing scientists measuring the length of their spikes in front of him. But Starscream had taken that as a victory that Soundwave could not get rid of him that easily.

He quietly snuck to the part of the lab that had samples of energon from various frame-types in the army. Starscream had refused to participate in this particular little experiment Shockwave had done just to be obstinate (something about clones or making gestalts combine or something), but Starscream knew that Jetfire had been particularly adamant about not giving a sample despite being the only shuttle in the Decepticon army. In a fit of pettiness, Starscream had taken it upon himself to get the sample for Shockwave, who had not been nearly as appreciative as he should have been. It might have had something to do with the method involving denta and the berthroom, but Starscream had merely shrugged.

He found the sample among the others and pulled it to a console. Why would Jetfire want so much to avoid giving a sample unless he was hiding something?

Many thoughts had sprung to his processor as to what it could be. Was Jetfire actually a clone? An Autobot plant? Was he being controlled by an alien parasite? Was he afflicted by some kind of disease that completely changed his personality?

Skyfire had been such a gentle giant. He had stoically held out against joining the Decepticon movement and had tried to protect Starscream from doing the same.

Jetfire was a menace. He quickly took control of the seekers and attempted to control Starscream’s every move.

He examined the sample and put it to the computer for analysis. Nothing came back as alarming. No tells were jumping out at Starscream. He threw the sample under a microscope, hoping maybe he could draw some of his own conclusions. 

The sample was normal. Absolutely-fragging normal. He huffed his vents in frustration. He tried adding catalysts to see how it reacted to different stimuli; maybe he was a mutant? A Quintesson plant? Everything came back normal.

He quickly was able to rule out everything that he could think of. Jetfire was real, and Starscream quickly felt some despair tickling at the edge of his processor that there was no fix for this. That Jetfire… Skyfire was actually gone, had murdered Skywarp, hated him, had morphed into the worst version of himself and took any redemption of Starscream with his passing.

He just wanted something about Jetfire to make _sense_.

Starscream went to move the sample from the microscope, hoping to throw it across the room in a fit of pettiness, but he noticed it was askew on the microscope. He attempted to right it with the tip of a digit, but no matter how carefully he pushed it, the sample glass would not lay on the tray flush. This should not be happening, as the glass had a tiny magnet in it that would keep it in place. Opposites attract; the negative polarity on the microscope would pair up with the positive polarity of the sample, keeping it secure.

This sample was negative polarity.

Starscream narrowed his optics. He ran some more tests and found that in fact, Jetfire’s molecular biology was completely negative polarity. This was not something that could easily be achieved. Certain imaging scans in a medical bay could produce this effect temporarily, and yet the very electrons of Jetfire’s molecules were going the opposite way around the nuclei, even now, months after the sample had been taken.

He took a deep vent. Was he just looking for an excuse here? Was this in fact what it looked like?

He tossed the sample, cleaned up the lab, and went to find someone with more scientific knowledge than he.

* * *

“Not now, Starscream,” Shockwave said as he typed away at the console in the dark. It was still the darkest hour of the night, when most bots would be in recharge. Shockwave was far too tired to deal with the seeker’s antics.

“Apologies, Shockwave, I just wanted to run a question by you. For fun.”

Shockwave slowly turned around from the console to see the seeker standing there with his servos behind his back. The picture of innocence, and anything but. 

He also looked tired. His optics were slightly dim and lidded with lack of recharge. His armor had a dull sheen to it. He was looking at Shockwave with curiosity and an arched optic ridge.

Shockwave didn’t like Starscream. But he also knew that Starscream had lost a lot in the last few days. He rolled his optic and picked up a datapad. “Ask your question,” he said as he flicked through some reports.

Starscream smiled, genuinely. Rare. “What do you know of alternate realities?”

Shockwave allowed his optic to flick to the seeker. “In theory, there are an unlimited number of parallel universes precisely equivalent to our universe, and those that diverge from our own.”

“And could one travel to an alternate dimension?”

Shockwave’s optic narrowed. “Alternate _reality._ Dimension is an incorrect term. What _did_ they teach you in Iacon?” he said. Starscream smiled sheepishly as he shrugged. Odd that he didn’t rankle at the insult. “Again, in theory, yes. One could travel to alternate realities or universes from their own. Calibrating a resonating frequency to find one similar enough to our own would be difficult, given that you have a device that could achieve this goal. Which is, of course, impossible.”

Starscream nodded. “But _why_ is it impossible?”

Shockwave exvented. “There are not enough scientists left on Cybertron to perform the calculations necessary to discover a passage to alternate dimensions. Not to mention, this pursuit would be unnecessary to our war effort.”

Starscream’s optics brightened a little. “I see.”

Shockwave put the datapad down. “Is there a point to these questions, Starscream, or are they merely a manifestation of grief?”

Starscream’s smile disappeared immediately and was replaced with a carefully calculated neutral look. His optics bored into Shockwave with an intense stare. “Thank you for your time, Shockwave.” He turned on his pede and stormed out, slamming the door on his way out.

Shockwave watched him leave with a suspicious optic. He then sent a private comm to Soundwave and went back to work.

* * *

Jetfire quietly sat in his berthroom on the Ark, the lights dimmed. Half of his helm plating was off on the table as he used a mirror to see into his cranial processor, and the core override that had been installed only a day-cycle earlier. With tools, he deftly manipulated it, rearranged the wires and then deactivated it. He quietly replaced the plating with a scowl.

The Optimus and Prowl of this universe had been so easy to manipulate. He _did_ know all about core overrides used in Praxus before the war. He had brought them with him from his universe and given them to Praxus law enforcement as a means to incite outrage against the Autobots. He of course also knew how to easily disable them.

He had somehow been lucky when randomly picking a universe to invade. Though confusing at first as many things were the opposite from what he was used to, it was also younger along in its war timeline than he was used to. War between the Autobots and Decepticons was almost always a reality no matter what universe he tried, so he only had massage a few points to help it along. 

By the end of his scheme, he had everything he had wanted. He had command over the most feared battalion in the Decepticon army. He had the trust and praise of Megatron. 

And he had Starscream. A Starscream that shared his love of sadism and wanted to rule the Decepticons together.

But the realization dawned on him over time that he didn’t actually _want_ this Starscream. He didn’t want someone already corrupted, he wanted to be the one who _corrupted_ him. Starscream of this universe was a sycophant, a liar, and an ambitious, arrogant piece of slag. There was no excitement to him anymore, and Jetfire had grown bored. He was already dark.

It had taken him this long to realize that what he actually wanted was _his_ Starscream from his own universe to fall from grace. 

This alternate reality Starscream was more gifted at machinations than he had realized. He attempted to manipulate and control the seeker for his own gains, but the seeker had managed to slip out of every plot. He had even gained the loyalty and following of the seekers and turned them against him. Then, even Megatron had started to turn his attention to Starscream. Jetfire knew it was only a matter of time before he lost control of the situation, so he stepped ahead and did as much damage on his way out as he could.

So to the naïve Autobots he went. This mirror-universe group of resistance fighters who paled in comparison to his universe’s terrifying warriors of the same names and even faces. Here he could continue to manipulate things in his favor.

In most realities, the Ark crash lands on Earth. And he needed to get back there anyway to return to his own reality. 


	2. Chapter 2

Starscream stood before Megatron with Shockwave and Soundwave, each reporting in about the status of their individual branches of the army. The warlord was angry, and it was no mere thing. 

He was incensed.

All three of them shared a piece of his anger. Shockwave for suggesting this foolish plan of forced reformatting with the Allspark and escalating the conflict with the Autobots to where they are now. Soundwave for not blocking the communication that had been sent out from Ultra Magnus from his cell until it had already done its irreparable damage and cluing the Autobots into the plan they were considering.

Starscream had the honor of standing in for Jetfire’s disgrace and betrayal, but also received punishment for not being sure the shuttle was dead in the first place.

The seeker got off the floor, wiping energon from the corner of his mouth with the back of his servo. He had managed to keep his vocalizer mostly muted during the beating he had received, but a few painful screeches had reverberated off the walls. He knew he would get no sympathy from anyone in the room, so he merely kept his servos at his sides and bowed, waiting to be dismissed.

“The arrogant fool has spelled his own doom, destroying Cybertron and himself with it. We will be putting all of our effort into finding the Allspark and the Autobots,” Megatron said angrily. “Prime has finally shown his true colors here. He doesn’t care for Cybertron, he just wishes to have moral superiority in this fight. I will not forget that this escalation in our conflict was achieved not by any actions we actually took, just in assumptions of what we might do,” he said, glaring at his officers. 

“Prepare the _Nemesis._ Shockwave, Soundwave, you are dismissed. Prove my faith in you is not misplaced.” The two of them turned and walked out, not sparing Starscream a second glance.

The seeker watched their receding backs while still remaining bowed. He suppressed a sigh. 

Megatron walked over to him and roughly grabbed his chin, lifting it so that their optics met. “You took your punishment well,” he said as his thumb grazed over the seeker’s lips. He held the seeker’s gaze for a moment longer until Starscream felt the urge to squirm under the scrutinization. Megatron released his chin, but then reapplied his servo to Starscream’s neck. The hold was gentle, testing. The warlord searched for a reaction in Starscream’s optics.

The seeker swallowed thickly, feeling Megatron’s grip tighten slightly. “My lord is gracious to allow second chances,” he said quietly.

Megatron removed his servo and smirked, walking back to his throne. “What do you intend to do with your second chance?”

Starscream shifted on his pedes. “I wouldn’t deign to assume I had a choice,” he said carefully.

Megatron’s optics watched him. “Come now, Starscream. Impress me.”

Starscream paused a moment more before jutting out his chin. “I would first take it upon myself to deliver you Jetfire’s helm on a pike, my liege. For his betrayal of you and the cause.”

“You would need to find him first,” Megatron said, his vocalizer even.

Starscream became submissive again, bowing. “He was still here, killing seekers in his wake after Prime left. Now there is significantly less activity,” he said slowly.

“You think he has left he planet?”

Starscream nodded, carefully. “About that, my lord. I have a theory.” Starscream took a large vent. “I do not believe Jetfire has fully embraced the Autobot crusade but is merely using them opportunistically.” He saw Megatron’s optics narrow in disagreement, but he continued anyway. “I believe he is using the Autobots to retrieve a weapon he had hidden on a planet some time ago so that he can destroy you and claim power over the Decepticons and Autobots alike.”

Starscream paused, waiting for Megatron to react. The warlord’s frown deepened, but otherwise remained impassive. The seeker tried not to let his resolve falter. Too much was riding on Megatron believing his story. “Many years ago, prior to joining the Decepticons, Jetfire was involved in an exploration accident; he had fallen and disappeared during a terrible blizzard on an alien planet. I was able to rescue him, but to my surprise, he had not gone into stasis during the time he had been buried under the ice. He was awake and quite well. I found this troubling at the time, but alas allowed my… affection for my friend to cloud my better judgement.”

Megatron looked bored, but still didn’t interrupt. “It occurred to me later, my lord, that he had spent his time doing _something_ on the planet. I detected some strange anomalies on the planet in the vicinity where he was found. Some of these anomalies point to a negative polarity fission weapon. The implication of such a weapon would define the outcome of our very war.”

Megatron tilted his helm. “And you wish to retrieve this weapon before Jetfire can get a hold of it?”

Starscream swallowed again. The big finish. “No, my lord. I think the weapon must be destroyed. I think our conflict with the Autobots has escalated enough.” A calculated lie, like many of his other ones. He hoped he had guessed right about Megatron’s sentiments on using big weapons to finish a war that should be won by attrition.

Megatron made a contemplative noise. “And you would not seek to actually want to use this weapon against me and take command of the Decepticons yourself?”

Starscream scoffed lightly. “Perish the thought, my lord. Jetfire has wounded me beyond repair,” he said, allowing his vocalizer to crack slightly, “and I would only ask for the chance to stymie his actions against you and prove my superiority to him.” He hoped he wasn’t laying it on too thickly. Megatron might not believe every word he said, but if he at least entertained the idea, then Starscream could proceed with his plan.

Megatron looked up at the ceiling as if weighing some options internally. Finally, he nodded. “I do not doubt your motivations, Seeker Commander. I think you have just cause to want Jetfire offlined. I just wonder at your competence in the matter. You have already had the opportunity and failed to do so.”

Starscream failed to reign in his anger. “He _should_ have offlined, my lord. I was deceived!” he shouted. His optics went wide as he realized his outburst. He then pulled back, steeled himself with a reset of his vocalizer. “If you would allow me this chance, I would not disappoint you.”

Megatron’s optics blazed in the dim lighting of the room. “So you think that the Autobots are heading for this… planet. That Jetfire will have convinced them to go there? That’s an awfully large risk to take.”

Starscream tried to affix an expression that was the utmost of sincerity and conviction. “It is a possible course my liege. A hunch. We can send out ships to all known corners of the universe, but I am merely offering one possible path.”

Megatron was a statue of calm upon his throne. Starscream waited patiently for Megatron to react in any way; just _something_. He realized now it was a whole new thing to have unfettered access to the warlord; something he had not experienced under Jetfire’s thumb. It was both invigorating as it was terrifying. 

Despite all of Jetfire’s faults, he had positioned himself between the seeker and the warlord. Starscream knew that Jetfire and Megatron had enjoyed an almost mentor and tutor kind of relationship; close and forged. Starscream had coveted it but was not sure how to grasp it for himself. He had desperately wanted to step out of the shuttle’s large shadow, but now that he was there, he felt exposed. 

Jetfire’s absence was reluctantly missed at times like these.

“Very well,” Megatron’s voice rumbled, breaking him out of his thoughts. “Give the coordinates of this planet to Shockwave and make sure you are on the ship that will bring you close to there. The rest of our armada will continue the plan of looking elsewhere. If you are correct, then we will rendezvous on your coordinates.”

“Thank you, my lord.”

“You are dismissed.”

Starscream turned and fled the hall before Megatron could notice the dark smirk he had on his faceplate.

* * *

It had been easy to secure his own ship with his most loyal seekers onboard. It had been somewhat easy to convince Shockwave and Soundwave that Megatron was allowing him to _pick_ the coordinate grid he wanted to search.

It was hard to deal with the sinking feeling he might have been wrong.

The seekers were restless, and despite being happy that they were no longer under the brute that Jetfire had been, they were already grousing under Starscream’s leadership. Starscream had developed a skillset that involved shadows and whispers and _careful_ manipulation, not strong, forward leadership that would inspire mechs to behave. He was becoming exasperated too quickly, and the grumblings had only grown louder.

Still, he committed to his plan. Skyfire had changed after being rescued off that accursed ice ball of a planet. That is when Jetfire had come into their world. There was some kind of connection there, something that he hadn’t quite figured out yet. If Jetfire was from another universe, there might be some kind of portal there or something.

It was the makings of a plan, and not fully realized. He understood that this was dangerous to keep the will and sparks of his mechs on task. He needed something to show for it, and quickly.

Starscream felt he had a decision to make. They were rapidly approaching the planet, but there was still no sign of the Autobots. He decided to trust his hunch and strike out alone. He told Thundercracker he had an undercover mission from Megatron and that he should take over their ship. He snuck out an airlock and headed for the planet on his own.

He entered the atmosphere and found the location where Skyfire had disappeared so long ago.

It was with no small sense of pride that he noticed that the Ark had crash-landed nearby. It looked like it had happened recently. They must have missed it in sensor sweeps or its signature had been damaged in the crash.

He smirked as he saw Jetfire emerge from the ship, and lock optics with him and curse.

* * *

“Is that… Starscream?” Bumblebee said, clearly having been knocked around in the crash. Some other members of the crew peered out of the opening of the ship.

Jetfire looked confused and angry. But Pit, who actually knew what that guy was thinking?

Megatron’s former Commander of the Seekers had proven to be invaluable to them on this trek across space. It had been confusing at first as he wasn’t on the ship in the beginning; in fact, they were pretty sure he had been left behind. But he told them that he knew the Decepticons were going to be launching ships to follow them, and he wanted to give them his assistance, so he had trekked out after them.

They had not really pulled apart his explanation too closely. It was _odd_ though that he knew where they were in space and was able to catch up to them so quickly. But Optimus had explained they had shared frequencies with Elita before they left, so it was possible she had assisted. 

He had helped navigate, found fuel sources, and kept them one step ahead of the seeker ship as they cast about in space looking for the Allspark that seemed to just elude them.

Jetfire kept looking at a timer on his chronometer. Optimus noticed and put a servo on his arm. “Is everything alright, friend?” he said.

The shuttle was frowning. “I had hoped we had lost the Decepticons on our tail,” he said indicating the waiting seeker. With a sigh, Jetfire turned to Optimus. “It would be my honor, Prime, if you would allow me to deal with him.”

Optimus looked thoughtful and flicked his blue optics at the lone seeker. “He’s… alone? That’s odd, don’t you think? Are you sure this isn’t some kind of trap?”

“Big bot- we have a lot of incoming bogeys that are native organic in nature. We are receiving a lot of hails from them,” Wheeljack said over the comms.

Optimus turned to Jetfire. “You need to stop Starscream from causing an incident with the natives. You are the only one who can fly to keep up with him. Please be careful.”

Jetfire barely nodded before he was transforming and heading in the direction of Starscream.

* * *

Starscream watched the shuttle approach without moving. He saw him transform and land on the ground about 50 feet away. The icy wind whipped against his frame, licking at his plating and spurring all kinds of unpleasant memories from the last time he was here.

They regarded each other in silence, Starscream glaring and Jetfire looking contemplative.

Jetfire cocked his helm to the side. “I wonder how you beat us here,” he called, starting to walk towards the seeker warily.

Starscream threw out his chin. “I wonder how I didn’t notice that you were… _wrong_.”

Jetfire recoiled slightly, stopping in his tracks. He regarded the seeker like he was seeing him for the first time.

“I don’t know what you mean. Too many hits from Megatron making your processor hitch?” Jetfire said smiling as he started walking again.

Starscream unfolded his arms on his chassis and put them on his hips. “What happened to Skyfire?”

Jetfire stopped again and smiled wider. “But _Starscream_. _I’m_ Skyfire,” he said, putting a servo over his spark, like he was offended. “Don’t you recognize me?”

Starscream felt his plating begin to crawl. “I make the rare concession that you fooled me. Probably because I didn’t want to see it,” he said with a bitter aftertaste in his mouth.

Jetfire’s mouth twitched as he stopped walking again. Then he chuckled. And then he was laughing with his entire frame. The laughter was a micron away from being unhinged. It felt like it had been suppressed for so long that it had festered in the shuttle’s vocalizer. “So you _are_ a clever seeker! I so _hoped_ I would be around to see your face when you realized it,” he said, wiping cleaning fluid from his optic. “You were so _pathetic_ when you found me, it was just so easy to manipulate you,” he said. “I wonder, what actually tipped you off?”

Starscream was unnerved. He had expected more denials from the shuttle, but here he was, admitting to it. “ _Everything_ tipped me off, you ingrate! But I couldn’t see you for what you were until after you murdered Skywarp.”

Megatron had trusted the shuttle’s counsel; that should have been the first clue. He spoke beautiful words of equality and of letting any Autobot who wanted to defect, giving legitimacy to Megatron’s claims to be the better faction. Starscream knew it was all farce for their warlord but went through the motions publicly. Slowly though, Megatron’s words and actions stopped aligning. Or maybe they never did, and he was growing less patient with the façade as victory rapidly approached. But Skyfire had vowed time and time again that Megatron was a menace, and would never have worked with the warlord.

Another clue was Jetfire’s hypocrisy. The mech espoused a strange sense of honor and duty to kill a soldier he once led. According to spies, Jetfire had walked into Optimus’s open arms, claimed Megatron had lost his way by murdering Ultra Magnus, and he would gladly assist the Autobots. This was barely two cycles after Skywarp had died Starscream’s arms. 

But Starscream knew better. He _knew_ Jetfire. He had not had a change of heart. He was not merely being ironically hypocritical. The shuttle was doing this to overthrow Megatron and make Starscream suffer. Megatron had always said to weaponize weaknesses.

Skywarp had been one of Starscream’s weaknesses.

When they had captured the Autobot Wheeljack and the energon scavenger, Starscream had made his move to do what Megatron _actually_ wanted: annihilate the Autobots on sight. The war had gone on long enough for half-measures. Jetfire lashed out swiftly, slicing off his servo in an attempt to control Starscream. Skywarp, of all mechs, had been the first to fire a shot and attack him back.

He should have known better when Jetfire had requested Skywarp accompany him on a mission. He should have forbidden it. He should have found a different seeker. He should have gone himself.

Jetfire murdered Skywarp and didn’t even try and deny it in front of Megatron. Jetfire knew Starscream’s affection for his goofy and foolish trinemate. He had been the glue between Thundercracker’s stoic calm and Starscream’s bristling arrogance that had made them so effective. He was an element that could not easily be replaced.

Jetfire’s optics looked cold and distant. “His death… was regrettable.”

Starscream had confusion wash over his faceplate, but then he snarled. “How _dare_ you?! You _regret_ his death now?!” Hadn’t he killed Skywarp to hurt him? Was he… lying?

“You forget that I commanded you all for millennia, Starscream. Even the coldest mech can develop affection for the things he owns. Even affection for you.”

Starscream sputtered, looking away across the ice and snow in anguish. This could not be happening. Jetfire… was the cause of all of his suffering. He was the aberrant element to his life and why things weren’t perfect.

“You’ve been killing your former subordinates ever since you walked into Optimus’s arms,” the seeker spat. “Forgive me if I find your words disingenuous.”

Jetfire swept his servos out to his sides. “It pains me all the same. I’m doing what needs to be done. That doesn’t mean I enjoy it.”

It would be so much easier if Jetfire could just let him hate him. Even as much as he had convinced himself he hated the shuttle, the truth was his emotions were much more conflicted than he had realized. Deep in his spark he had _wanted_ to hear Jetfire had remorse for all the things he had done. He had clearly been impersonating the one person that Starscream trusted more than anyone else, even himself. He had taken advantage of Starscream. He had manipulated him, changed him, and then… abandoned him. To hear that the shuttle was even remotely aware of the pain he had caused, and that maybe some of his affection, however sparse, had been genuine should not have confused him so.

Starscream hadn’t noticed Jetfire had closed the distance between them and now stood close in front of him. Starscream looked up at his faceplate and imagined he saw the same kind of conflict he had as well. The seeker’s battle programs were trying to come online, and a voice deep in his processor was telling him to move, to kill, to maim. But he held still.

“Was it all a lie then?” he said, quietly, vocalizer staticky. “I know you aren’t Skyfire and were just pretending to be… but it’s not that clear-cut, is it?”

Jetfire reached out a servo, hesitated, then cupped Starscream’s cheek. “It is not that simple,” he said softly.

Suddenly there was the loud crackling of jets overhead as the organics of the planet descended. Starscream was distracted, thinking it was the seekers of the armada that had finally caught up to them. He then heard the singing of Jetfire’s blade as it sliced through the air towards him and he managed to step back out of the way just in time. The shuttle looked pained and angry as he started running off towards the spot where Starscream had found him all those years ago.

Starscream followed, trying to aim at his back but found that the blade had sliced through his null-rays. He jumped and transformed, just as Jetfire did the same.

* * *

The organics were shouting something overhead in their language, but the shuttle and the seeker couldn’t be bothered. Starscream transformed back into root and did a diving pounced on Jetfire, managing to ground him. Jetfire then transformed and threw him off roughly, slicing at him again with his blade.

The seeker’s presence was annoying, and it appeared he was smarter than Jetfire had ever given him credit for. Jetfire should never have underestimated Starscream, even if it wasn’t _his_ Starscream.

The truth was, even though he had grown bored of the seeker, what he said was true. Things were not that simple. But he couldn’t let him live with the knowledge he had. The thought pulled at his spark a little.

Jetfire enjoyed collecting. It would be a shame to destroy something he had cultivated over time.

This time, the slice managed to graze Starscream’s wing, and the seeker shouted out in pain. He threw himself at Jetfire, punching him and actually managing to kick his knees out from under him. Jetfire had gone down with surprised optics; Starscream had never really gotten the drop on him when the sparred before. The seeker did a roundhouse-kick to the shuttle’s helm and he felt his vison erupt in static. Jetfire hissed, feeling energon bleed out of his audio where Starscream’s pede had contacted. 

Then his chronometer went off with an alarm. He felt his fuel freeze in his tanks. He had to _move_.

He staggered to his pedes and started running, he was so close now. He could see the faint shimmer of the portal starting to emerge, like heat coming off an engine in the hottest of days. 

But Starscream was behind him, running, about to tackle him. Jetfire attempted to duck, but his knee gave out and he fully fell, immobilized.

Starscream soared over him and tumbled into the portal with a green flash. And then it was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Earthrise trailer literally came out yesterday, and while I guessed a few directions, I was wrong about others. I'm already jumping into AU territory here so we are just going for it. Jetfire was all over the trailer, but clearly on Cybertron, so that is a small divergence for my story, and something that is kind of a plot point later so we'll get to it.
> 
> Next chapter we'll be through the looking glass, as that's where I wanted to spend most of our time. Thanks for comments!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY though the looking glass lol. Much love and thanks to my friend @OverlordRaax for helping me do a read through because my life got a LITTLE crazy this week and I wanted to get this out to you all before I fall behind <3
> 
> Thanks again for all the comments and kudos! :D

Skyfire turned the corner and almost walked right into Starscream.

The aerial’s blue optics had gone wide in shock, and his entire frame had tensed as soon as he saw the shuttle. But then he fell into rehearsed relaxation, his shock softening in recognition, blinking as he reset his optics. 

“Starscream! I’m so sorry-“ Skyfire began, his servos up placatingly. He panicked, taking a step back, fearful.

The jet-alt held a servo over his chassis and smiled. “Skyfire, it’s quite alright, you just scared me is all,” he said with a deep vent. 

Skyfire still was conflicted and felt his faceplate twist in worry. “I didn’t realize you would be here, or I would not have volunteered for the transport,” he said, wringing his servos. “I apologize.”

Starscream shook his helm slightly in incredulous confusion. “Skyfire, you don’t need to apologize for _existing_ ,” he said gently. He gave another warm smile and inclined his head. “I do need to get going though, I’m late,” he said pointing down the hallway. The shuttle awkwardly moved to the side as Starscream stepped around him, striding around and clicking his pedes down the hallway. “See you later,” he said over his shoulder with a wave of his white servo.

Skyfire mentally punched himself. He had been trying so hard to give this Starscream space, and now his eagerness to assist the Decepticons and prove his trustworthiness he might have undone months of progress with the aerial. It had taken almost a stellar cycle for most members of the Decepticon faction not to turn their weapons on him on the spot, and at least another one for the glares and whispers to die down. But from what Megatron had informed him, he understood that Starscream might never be able to trust him fully.

Even though it was the one thing he wanted in the world.

* * *

Starscream slid past the waiting mechs in the meeting room and found Soundwave waiting near the front with the other officers.

“Starscream; I hope you will forgive me thus,  
Skyfire’s presence I forgot to discuss.”

Starscream waved a servo in dismissal. “Please, I’m not _fragile_ , Soundwave. You and everyone else should spend their time worrying on things other than my mental well-being,” he said smiling. “Besides. Skyfire is an asset to our team.”

Soundwave inclined his head in agreement.

“Skyfire is not quite the mech we once knew,  
But memories are still painful for you.”

Starscream smiled with just a hint of irritation in his optics. “I’m _fine_ friend. Please don’t make assumptions on my feelings. Everyone else does it, and I’d rather not have it from you too.”

Soundwave bowed in understanding. He then went to the front of the room to address the gathered Decepticons who were chatting nervously as they waited for the operation to commence.

“As you all are quite aware of the time,  
Please take your seats and vocalize no more;   
To disrupt the plots of Optimus Prime  
Our team is in place to help stop the war.

Rumble and Laserbeak, please report in;  
Please tell us when you think it will begin.”

The display in the front of the room flickered to life as a live-feed from Laserbeak showed a white, icy planet blanketed in snow. The feed zoomed in on Rumble who was hunched behind a large snowbank, watching some mechs in the distance. They were standing around waiting for something, but it wasn’t clear what.

“Yah it seems they are expecting company,” Rumble’s voice wafted over the connection. “Seems like something is starting to happen over there now… some kind of flash of light or something. They’re moving in and… uh… what?”

Laserbeak zoomed in on where the mechs were concentrated, and they saw a new mech there. An aerial.

It was obvious the conversation was heated. The Autobots were gesticulating wildly and the aerial was shrugging, looking hostile. Then one of the Autobots went for the aerial’s wing, and all hell broke loose. 

The aerial _shrieked_ and started attacking the Autobots, who were a surprised as anyone else in the room. The moves this mech made were lithe and practiced; it was clear he had been trained for combat. Starscream felt confusion wash over his faceplate as he thought he knew all of the aerials that were left, and this mech held no recognition for him. 

Finally, the battle was over, the aerial laughing manically as he panted from exertion. He looked around and spotted Laserbeak, and then found Rumble behind the bank.

“You certainly look familiar,” the aerial said. “Are you… Rumble?”

The mini-record nodded dumbly. “And you are… a Decepticon?” Rumble said pointing to the insignias on the aerial’s wings. “I am too,” continued Rumble, pointing to his chest.

The aerial seemed to relax a little at that. “Yes… I suppose so.”

Laserbeak and descended and now sat on the arm of Rumble. The occupants of the room now had a clear image of the aerial that had just disrupted the Autobot’s plans, and resounding reaction had been confusion.

Starscream could feel the optics of everyone in the room staring at him and boring into his back, but his blue optics were just fixed on the screen. He had to admit, the resemblance was uncanny, and so were some of the mannerisms and the way that he spoke. Who was this mech?

There was a loud noise of an energon rod being dropped and shattered on the ground. Everyone turned to see Skyfire’s optics fixed on the screen with a slack jaw. Quickly, he seemed to remember himself and leaned down to begin to clean up the mess. Starscream narrowed his optics.

As Soundwave tried to get everyone’s attention again, Starscream slipped to the back of the room and knelt down to help Skyfire clean up. It appeared the shuttle was so shaken that he didn’t notice who it was who was helping right away until he spoke.

“It appears you might know our new aerial,” Starscream said quietly.

Skyfire’s servos froze momentarily as he registered Starscream’s proximity. “Uh… maybe. I’m not sure,” he said quietly as he wiped up the energon.

“Can we trust him?” Starscream asked, picking up the last of the shards and placing them in a cloth he then threw into subspace.

The question seemed to give Skyfire pause again. “Uhm. Well. I’m not sure about that either,” he said glancing at the screen again, his optics squinting. “I don’t know what his motivations might be. It’s been uh, a long time.”

Starscream watched Skyfire carefully. This was something new and enigmatic from the shuttle since he had reappeared in his life a few years ago claiming to have amnesia and a reformed personality. Starscream didn’t doubt the change was genuine and permanent. It was a hunch, but he didn’t feel any of the danger he had felt with Jetfire. Yet he knew though that Skyfire still had plenty of secrets of his own.

It appeared that this new aerial might be part of the puzzle.

“Do you mind talking to him? Finding out what his motivations might be? It might be easier with a familiar face…” he said, watching Skyfire carefully.

Skyfire closed his optics briefly and sighed. “I can try. I will do whatever you need me to do…” he said trailing off. “However. He probably thinks I am… dead. It might be a shock to him.”

Starscream’s brow furrowed. Then gently, “Do you wish it to remain that way? That he thinks you no longer function?”

Skyfire had a ghost of smile play on his faceplate. “…No, I suppose I can’t keep running forever,” he said cryptically.

Starscream nodded slowly and then stood. “I will arrange an interview room for you then. And I think you and I might need to chat more later,” he said.

Skyfire sighed. “I imagine so.” He turned to go, but then stopped. “Would it be asking too much of you for me to talk to him alone at first?”

Starscream seemed to be looking at Skyfire with new optics. This was highly out of character for him to ask anything of anyone… and Starscream knew then it must be important. “We will be standing by. You have earned our trust one-hundred-fold, so if you need a moment, I can arrange it.”

Skyfire’s faceplate had softened in a way that made Starscream feel both nostalgic and distressed at the same time. It helped that it was blue optics staring at him, but of course, those were easily replaced. He nodded, turning away before Skyfire might notice a reluctant blush.

* * *

Skyfire had shuffled into a small meeting room at the end of the hall at Starscream’s behest. He explained that the new aerial was to arrive on Cybertron and the Decepticon base through their stellar spanner they still had on the crashed Nemesis on Earth. 

Skyfire waited, knowing that his carefully constructed existence he had eked out in this strange mirror-universe was likely coming to a close. The thought filled him with some panic, but there was not much that could be done. 

The mech in question was talking with his escorts, making some kind of joke that was well-received.

“I am to wait in here, then?” he heard asked, muffled through the door.

“Yes, there is a mech in here who might know you.”

“Oh? Who could possibly-“

When the door opened, Skyfire had intended to say something witty, or at least something to clue Starscream into what was happening. He hoped that Starscream wouldn’t give anything away with an outburst.

He didn’t expect Starscream to just deflate and look broken.

Starscream looked very similar to the last time the shuttle had seen him, just maybe more… militant. He clearly had thicker armor in important places, and he had some weapons that looked damaged but were also a permanent fixture to his frame. That was definitely new. 

Also new was the look of exhaustion on the seeker’s faceplate. Starscream was a ball of hyperactive energy in the best of times, so it was curious that he just looked extremely spent. It didn’t seem like it was just a recharge issue, either.

The door closed behind the seeker, and he jumped a little, then closed his optics. “I had thought… that I had escaped you,” Starscream said, measuredly. 

Skyfire wrinkled his faceplate, bemused. “…Sorry to disappoint you, I guess?”

Starscream’s optics snapped back open to look at him and pulled back at that response. His optics were searching Skyfire’s faceplate as if there was some kind of hidden trick or punchline approaching, but nothing came.

“… Sky?” The vocalization was weak, and tremulous. Starscream looked more vulnerable than Skyfire had ever seen him.

Skyfire nodded, still confused. “Of course it’s me, who else would it be?” he asked, tilting his helm.

Starscream trembled for a moment, looking like he was about to come apart at the seams. He then jumped across the table, throwing his arms around Skyfire in a bruising hug. Skyfire had begun to turn thinking he was being attacked but stifled a cry when he realized Starscream was just holding him.

“Wha- Star, what? What?” Skyfire was pulling back, gently trying to look at the faceplate of the seeker that was holding him. He had wrapped his arms around the seeker automatically and felt the seeker stifle a shiver at the contact. He was so confused. Starscream was hardly prone to _positive_ emotional outbursts, and this bordered on affectionate. He was practically shaking.

Maybe he was being too harsh. Starscream had likely thought he was dead, and to know that he functioned likely was enough to break through the bristling abrasion that was Starscream’s personality. He should not push his approaching dread of explaining the mech to the rest of the Decepticons onto the seeker who was innocent in this.

It was almost like Starscream remembered himself and slowly pulled away to stand next to him. “Wait, are you… _my_ Skyfire?” he asked, suspiciously. “…how did we meet?”

Skyfire smiled and didn’t correct the use of the possessive the seeker had. By the end of things, they did not belong to each other. That time was past. “Fundamentals of Xenobiology, Iacon University,” he replied. “Everyone wanted to pair up the only two mechs with wings because they thought we would understand each other better.”

The corner of Starscream’s mouth twitched. “We did not understand each other.”

“At all.” Skyfire smiled more. “Eventually we graduated… grew together… then grew apart. We were assigned to one last exploring mission to an ice-bound planet, where I went down in a storm.” Starscream’s optics hardened but he said nothing. “I went into stasis and the next thing I knew… I was here.”

Starscream was biting the inside of his cheek. He did that when he was weighing something in his mind, calculating his next moves and his opponent’s next four moves. 

“You seem to understand where we are,” Skyfire began carefully. “That this is not our universe.”

Starscream sat down at the chair across the table from the shuttle. “Yes, I had guessed that it was a… negative polarity universe.”

“How did you come to be here?”

Starscream sighed. “I was back on Earth on a mission, and… fell through a portal. Then the Autobots were waiting on the other side, apparently,” he said.

“Is that… where you got the damage?” Skyfire asked, noting Starscream’s null-rays had been sliced through and there was damage to his wing again.

Starscream looked to his null-rays with an odd expression, and just nodded.

Skyfire frowned. “So, the Autobots are aware of the portal our opposite universe. Are there any mechs from here over there?”

Starscream hesitated. It had been a long time, but Skyfire knew when the seeker was crafting a lie. Sometimes though, the fact that he was trying to lie was more telling than if Starscream had just told the truth in the first place. “None that I am aware of.”

“Starscream,” Skyfire said chidingly. “The Autobots were clearly waiting for someone other than you.”

The seeker huffed his vents. “If so, I can’t imagine who it was!”

Skyfire’s frown deepened but he did not press it. “And this portal… do you know anything about it?”

Starscream pursed his lipplates now. He was _deciding_ if he needed to lie or not. Skyfire almost rolled his optics. “The portal only activated for a moment. It seems like it might happen with some regularity; perhaps on a decycle rotation? Or to some algorithmic series. It had closed behind me when I left and the remaining Autobots had fled.” Starscream flicked his optics to Skyfire. “I didn’t… _mean_ to come through. It was an accident. And… I didn’t know you were here.”

Skyfire nodded, taking in the information carefully. There was not much that could be done now then; he was going to have to fess up about his identity to the Decepticons. It was dangerous that the Autobots knew of this thin place between their universes, and the Decepticons should be made aware.

“What was this mission you were on anyway-“ and then he stopped. Because he knew. His optics grazed over the insignia on his wings. “Ah. I see.”

Starscream turned on him with a characteristic sneer, likely sensing the change in his voice.

“How long did you wait to join the Decepticons after you thought I had died?” Skyfire said, his vocalizer bitter. “Did you even _look for me?”_

“Of COURSE I did, you idiot!” Starscream screeched. “But apparently _you weren’t there to find_.” Skyfire saw something of pain in Starscream’s optics, but he was still far too angry to be swayed.

“I thought we both agreed that Megatron’s ramblings were dangerous. You _promised_ me you would stay away from him!”

Starscream looked like he was about to say something but was holding himself back. Something burned in his red optics, and it looked painful. 

Instead he moved his faceplate into a grimace. “Oh so _you_ get to join the Decepticons, and I don’t?”

Skyfire was so done with him, already. “You _know_ it’s not the same, Starscream!”

Starscream wrinkled his brow in a look of frustration. “When Alpha Trion died-“

“WHAT-“

“-and the matrix of leadership skipped over Megatron and went to Orion Pax, Megaton’s movement gained a lot more… momentum,” Starscream said through clenched denta. “Things had changed, Skyfire. War broke out, everyone had to choose a side.”

Skyfire felt numb. “I had hoped that our universe was one where this war could be avoided,” he said. “I spent so much _time_ with you, trying to convince you to do the right thing. And then as soon as I’m gone, everything is wasted!” Skyfire knew, again, he was being harsh, but he could not pull back.

Starscream was none of the burning furnace of hate he usually was. Now, he was a cold, surgical instrument of fury. He stood, pointing a digit at Skyfire’s chassis. “Don’t you _dare_ try to change me!” Starscream shouted. “You can _reject me_ if you want, but I am who I am, _Skyfire_. I make no apologies for choosing a side in the war, or even choosing the Decepticons. I stand by my choice. You… _you_ weren’t there.”

Skyfire exvented. This was not how he had wanted this to go, and he knew it was his fault. His friend, his former lover, _his_ Starscream was here before him and had shown great vulnerability. And Skyfire was judging him for decisions he made eons ago.

“I’m sorry,” Skyfire said, his vocalizer hoarse. “I’ve kept a lot of things… close to my spark, and I’m taking them out on you. Because you know who I am and I don’t have to keep pretending around you.” He threw his optics down. “You are right. I was not there.”

Starscream appeared to be feeling magnanimous and some of the tension bled off his frame. “I am sorry I didn’t find… you.”

They stood there in the silence for a few kliks, before Skyfire cleared his vocalizer. “What are your intentions now?”

Starscream started to tap his pede as he crossed his arms across his chassis. “I… don’t even know what the choices are,” he said slowly. “I want to get back to our universe. I have unfinished business there.”

Skyfire nodded. “Well. We can work on that.”

Starscream tilted his helm. “…don’t you want to come back?”

Skyfire flicked his optics to the seeker. “I… don’t know. I didn’t think there was a _way_ back. I don’t think there is a life for me anymore.”

Starscream said nothing. “We could find a place for you…” he started, hopeful.

“Among the Decepticons? Hardly.”

Starscream was biting the inside of his cheek again.

“In the meantime, do you think you can resist causing trouble for Decepticons here? They will be like Autobots to you. I can’t set you loose among them if you can’t find a way to behave.”

Starscream narrowed his optics. “Do you have a position of power here, then?”

Skyfire shook his head. “No. Quite the opposite, actually. In fact, I’m afraid my very limited house of cards is coming down around me as we speak,” he said sadly. “When they found me in the ice, they recognized me as my counterpart from this universe named ‘Jetfire.’ I didn’t correct them. I just claimed that I had lost my memory and that the accident had changed me, because apparently I don’t act like him. I was able to gain their trust over the years, but when I saw you… well I’m not very good at lying, Starscream. Pretending to have amnesia for something you never experienced is easy. Explaining you… will be difficult.”

Starscream regarded him for a moment. “…Why did you never tell them the truth? They likely would have trusted you more.”

Skyfire knew exactly why he did it, but he wasn’t ready to tell Starscream. “I found it… easier.”

Starscream could probably smell a lie from a mile away but was definitely feeling generous today. “I can maintain your story, if that is what you want.”

Skyfire tilted his helm at that. “I can’t ask you to do that for me, Starscream.”

Starscream huffed. “Please, Skyfire. I’ll tell them I’m Unicron incarnate for you if that is what you want.”

Skyfire felt his spark surge a little at that. The old familiar feelings weren’t unwelcome. He chuckled. “Yeah so he’s the good ‘god’ here,” he said.

Starscream blanched at that. “ _Seriously?”_

Skyfire nodded laughing. “Okay well, we need to explain why you were there on the planet…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And yes, Soundwave is speaking in iambic pentameter because I may torture myself but I love you all? Headcannon is he turns into a Victrola and his cassettes are records. I regret nothing.
> 
> Hope you liked Starscream's double-speak :)


	4. Chapter 4

The white-helmed Starscream had given his update with Megatron, and the tank-alt had also reported. There still was no sign of Optimus Prime, so the mathematician-turned-revolutionary had asked Starscream to keep his helm on his shoulders and lead the Decepticons just a little longer at the base while he kept at his mission.

Starscream of course assured him he would do it without fail.

Soundwave and Shockwave had exchanged glances. Soundwave stepped forward to speak.

“’Thy adverse party is no ally made,  
harked more or less by thy continual haste.’  
Would that your return no longer delayed  
Lessen our tension as if then erased.”

Megatron’s optics had narrowed. “Don’t quote scripture at me, Soundwave.” His piercing blue eyes then turned to his second. “Starscream, can you handle things? I realize this is a burden, but I’m close to finding answers.”

Starscream waved his servo. “If you are close, then we cannot deny you. Take care of yourself.”

The line cut out and Starscream turned to face his two subordinates. “Come out and say it. You doubt me.”

Shockwave and Soundwave both shook their heads in protest and started talking over each other, rhyming couplet overlaying calm, easing tones. Soundwave stopped and let Shockwave explain.

“It is not fair that Megatron is placing this burden on you, Starscream. He should be here to help.” The orange mech sighed. “You don’t tell him of what you are going through, so he assumes he can just proceed as if everything is-“

“ _Megatron_ ,” Starscream interrupted angrily, “is the _only_ mech here who trusts me when I say I’m fine. I can handle this. I prefer him listening to me instead of you all ignoring me and trying to make decisions for me!”

Shockwave took a step forward with a servo outstretched, but Starscream’s blue optics blazed. Shockwave stopped, his optic looking down in admonishment. 

Soundwave’s golden optics trained on Starscream, not feeling the same guilt.

“Then if he thrives and you be cast away  
You tell the liege, to please him, thou art fine  
That I might see what he would deign to say  
Wert he here; our help you so oft decline.”

“You take too much upon yourself,” Shockwave said. “You are allowed to say no, or at the least ‘ _help_.’”

Starscream pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. He _was_ tired. He had been leading the Decepticons in Megatron’s stead for a little over a stellar cycle now, while not letting up on his scientific invention pursuits and his duties as second-in-command. But, less for himself and more to appease his fellow officers, he acquiesced. “ _Fine._ Fine. I will take leave and find something recreational to do for the next megacycle. I will leave the new aerial to you and operations in your capable servos.”

His fellow commanders seemed mollified, and some of the tension left their frames. He knew they cared, and that was the source of their worry. It had been a long couple of stellar-cycles recently, and things had been… difficult for the white and red flightframe. He dealt with things better when he threw himself into work.

Not everyone dealt with things the same way, but his friends and comrades didn’t understand that.

He cleared his schedule and disappeared to his own devices.

* * *

“…and I escaped the Autobots and found Rumble. Amazing story, really.” Starscream folded his arms across his chassis and smirked. 

Skyfire was holding a servo over his face casually. He was trying to hide his exasperated expression. The lies had been convincing, but definitely… elaborated.

“Okay then, Starshatter,” Shockwave said, his blue optic roving over the features of the seeker. “Apologies if this sounds rude, but… you bear a striking resemblance to our second-in-command, Starscream. Do you know why?”

The seeker’s optics glittered with amusement as he tilted his helm. “I don’t think you are suggesting that all flightframes look alike, are you?”

Shockwave reared back, his servos coming up and waving in protest. “A-absolutely not! Of course not.”

Skyfire stifled a groan.

“Two questions may I ask then Starshatter;  
Of Skyfire’s acquaintance I might ask to,  
And of course there is the final matter  
Of what it is next you intend to do.”

Skyfire saw a strange look cross in front of Starscream’s faceplate as the record-player spoke. It seemed like he recognized his questioner, but at the same time the mirror version of him gave him pause. Skyfire had remembered going through the same mental acrobatics when he had arrived here as well.

“I met Skyfire shortly after he lost his memories. I had been… captured by the Autobots and met him there.” Starscream had struggled with the lie admitting he had been captured, but Skyfire had explained it would be necessary for the timeline. “As to what I want to do next… well I want to help you of course. Help you defeat the Autobots.”

Soundwave paused for a moment then nodded. Shockwave held out a servo. “Well that answers about all of our questions. You will just need to submit to a medical exam, and then we can put you through a probationary period where we evaluate your abilities before committing you to missions.”

Starscream arced an optic ridge and then grasped Shockwave’s servo anyway. “Very well then.”

“Skyfire, you can show him to the visiting aerial barracks before we can get him his own quarters.” Skyfire nodded, and the shuttle led the seeker out of the room.

“The… elaborations were not necessary,” Skyfire muttered as they walked down the hallway.

Starscream snorted. “Please, I know what I’m doing. The details are just concrete enough that they are convincing, but vague enough that they can’t be proved wrong anyway. It’ll be fine,” he said smiling confidently. Starscream looked around the hallway they were headed down with a furrowed brow.

“Something wrong?” Skyfire asked.

Starscream glanced up at the shuttle and shrugged. “This place reminds me of my base, but everything is… _wrong_ ,” he said, wrinkling his noseplate.

“You’ll get used to it,” Skyfire said. “Do you spend a lot of time in the other Decepticon base then?” Skyfire asked with an arched optic ridge.

Starscream smirked wider. “So… there is a Megatron here too?” he asked, ignoring the question.

Skyfire pursed his lips. “Yes… and there is a Starscream here as well. But he’s second-in-command of the Decepticons as Aerial Commander.”

“Ahhh,” Starscream said with a genuine smile. “Some things are fated then,” he said, more to himself.

“What does that mean?”

Starscream shrugged. “I’ve not exactly stayed incognito while you were gone,” he sniffed.

Skyfire paused at a fork in the corridor. He was intending to take Starscream to the med bay as he had been instructed. But given Starscream’s comment, he thought he should nip something in the bud.

“I think you need to meet him,” he said.

“Who- Megatron?” Starscream said, perplexed.

“No,” Skfyire said, nodding to himself. “Starscream. Come along, Star _shatter_.”

The shuttle lightly turned Starscream around and pushed him down a different corridor. Skyfire felt Starscream tense under his servos but then forcefully relax. That was… odd. They had been physically close for so long before this, it had felt just natural to reach out and touch him, even in the most platonic of ways.

But of course, many things had changed over their time apart. They reached a door and Skyfire gently pushed him through the opening.

* * *

When the black-helmed Starscream crossed the threshold of the door, he was greeted with the most beautiful garden of crystal flowers he had ever seen. 

Vos had grown crystal flowers, but they were tiny, spindly things. Beautiful in their own right but leaning towards being hardy and stunted. Most of them were likely destroyed now that Cybertron was dying without the Allspark.

The flowers he saw here were fragile, delicate things that musically tinkled in the air. Where the sunlight touched them, they sparkled magnificently in prismatic colors, throwing tiny geodesic reflections of light on everything around them. There was a large assortment of colors, of size, of shape to the petals, each one more complex and fascinating than the next. The room was full of glass windows and a glass ceiling, much more an atrium than a room. The glass was paned in white, and the walls of the interior were a soft white, giving the room a warm glow. Outside the windows was just the beautiful, darkly resplendent sky of dusk.

And in the middle of all this beauty was a beautiful mech.

The white-helmed flier was gently pruning some crystal roses. Starscream was aware of crystal gardening; more akin to growing rocks than growing organic growths. It required a depth of patience that Starscream had never had. You had to be careful to not interfere with the crystalline layers depositing every day, and the conditions had to be quite perfect for them to develop. He begrudgingly accepted that the garden and its gardener’s talents were impressive.

It was clear to Starscream now that this was his counterpart in this mirror dimension.

His counterpart had not noticed them yet. His lips were pursed in studied concentration, his blue eyes flitting around to make sure he didn’t shatter the translucent crystal rose. His white servos were deft and delicate, taking care not to injure the fragile thing. His wings were set off the sides of his shoulders, almost like elaborate shoulder pauldrons, unlike Starscream’s that fanned off his back. It made the mech look more elegant somehow. The mech truly was gorgeous. 

He heard Skyfire sigh beside him. Starscream threw the shuttle an angry look.

Skyfire chuckled. “I knew you would be jealous if you ever met him.”

“ _Jealous_ ,” Starscream repeated. “Hardly.” Deep in his spark though, he felt a pang. Skyfire had been... thinking of him.

His counterpart lifted his head and noticed the other two mechs who were observing him. His face looked confused for a moment and then lit up with a warm smile as he waved gently and stood to close the distance between them.

“Be _nice_ ,” Skyfire whispered.

Starscream plastered his most indulgent smile on his faceplate. “Greetings, Air Commander,” he said dipping into a bow.

The aerial before him looked surprised and embarrassed. “Oh no need for that! I’m off-duty anyway,” he said. Starscream rose out of the bow and met his azure optics with his own ruby ones. It was unnerving to find the mech so similar to him yet so different. It was clear that the other Starscream shared the same quiet unease.

“I apologize, I didn’t realize you were off-duty,” Skyfire said conversationally. “I know you wanted to chat, but I was also tasked with giving a tour to Starshatter.”

“But you knew I’d be here?” the mech said with a hint of amusement. 

Starscream suddenly felt the urge to break all the pretty little flowers in the garden, but he resisted. “Did you grow all of… this?” he asked gesturing vaguely with his servo and smiling sweetly.

The white-helmed aerial nodded, with some slight embarrassment. “It’s not a particularly helpful hobby like inventing, but it is blessedly more predictable,” he replied. “It also reminds me of home,” he said wistfully.

Starscream noted the odd timbre of his counterpart’s voice there at the end when talking about “home.” He disliked not having all of the information to properly know how to manipulate the situation in his favor. Still, some small part of him understood missing… home. He began to cross his arms in front of his chassis but stopped when the aerial’s optics snapped to his null-rays.

“You are… damaged,” he said looking at them. His blue optics carefully traced over the seeker’s frame, and Starscream twitched his wings a little at the scrutinization. Starscream watched the aerial carefully and noticed that he had a strange look in his optics. Almost like… distant recognition. There was also a brief glance at Skyfire.

Starscream _really_ hated being left in the dark.

“Yes,” he replied. “I escaped my… capture from the Autobots.”

Skyfire stiffened beside him, and Starscream looked at him with a confused look. The shuttle had closed his optics and looked remorseful.

Starscream turned back to look at his counterpart who was just staring at him with pity. “I am… so sorry,” the aerial said. “If you ever need to talk, let me know. The same thing happened to me some time ago.”

Starscream wasn’t one that was often at a loss for words, but he felt something in his jaw tighten at the admission and the look of solidarity from the other mech. So, he nodded as the aerial turned away. “Skyfire, we can chat whenever. I think I’m going to go for a flight. It was a pleasure meeting you Starshatter.”

The clear dismissal was oddly sharp in Starscream’s mind, but he didn’t have enough understanding to figure out why. Skyfire put a soft servo on Starscream to move him out of the atrium. Starscream spared his counterpart one final look over his shoulder and then allowed himself to be led out.

* * *

They walked down the hallway in silence. Skyfire felt himself almost physically shaking from anger.

“Did I… do something wrong?” he heard Starscream ask in a small voice beside him.

Skyfire stopped and looked to his old friend. His red optics were slightly larger than usual, and he had allowed some of his usual grousing walls to fall down. He felt bad. “Oh. No, you didn’t. Sorry, Star. No, I’m angry at myself,” Skyfire said. “I should have come up with a different story for you. I’m just not very good at this,” he said, putting his faceplate into his servo. “I’ve been lying this entire time to everyone and then I picked the worst possible backstory for you. Starscream will likely pay _close_ attention to you, and that’s the last thing we need right now.”

Starscream had a flicker of understanding. “So you defaulted to a story similar to his, making him pity me,” he said neutrally. “Maybe we can use this to our advantage.”

Skyfire sighed. “Starscream, I want you to leave him out of whatever plan you’re plotting. He’s been through enough.”

Starscream looked slightly hurt then shrugged. “Fine. Let’s just get to the med bay and get this over with.” Yet the seeker stopped when they reached a window. He was transfixed at the landscape below.

Skyfire didn’t blame him. Cybertron’s ragged husk was arresting.

Despite his earlier irritation, the seeker looked to Skyfire with searching optics. “Is this… Cybertron?” he asked, somewhat horrified. There were dunes of sand with old rusted-out buildings sticking out. Gone were the old city-scapes and ancient hulking structures that used to dot the planet. Now it was just a wasteland, reduced to components and grains of silica.

“Yes,” Skyfire said, frowning. “Optimus Prime removed the Allspark from here before I even got here. Apparently, he also destroyed it so that the planet has no hope of recovery… ever.” Starscream’s optics were wide as he looked back out over the landscape.

“But we are trying. The Decepticons have the best scientists of any universe I’ve ever seen on their side. We’ve managed to make this base a sanctuary, and we use it to try and stop the Autobots from pillaging other planets. But it has been difficult. It’s times like this, I miss our Cybertron at home.”

Starscream shivered and turned away from the window with a strange look. Skyfire felt like he wanted to reach out and comfort the seeker. But he stopped himself.

“Let’s get going,” Starscream said, quieter than before.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh, I was HONORED to have some fanart of the last chapter done by the loveliest of artists, Losineko: [link on twitter](https://twitter.com/Locineko/status/1315563075311824898). She also has an amazing tumblr: https://losineko.tumblr.com/ It really is a writer's dream to have someone do fanart of their work, it's such a warm, amazing feeling. <3
> 
> Look a Skyfire's sigh! Look at Starscream's angry look! I CAN'T
> 
> On with the show <3 We are starting to pick up some plot here, and even more next chapter, so bear with me :)

“Apologies, Hook, I know we were expected here a little while ago.”

“Ah, no trouble at all. And you must be Starshatter?” the Constructicon said. “I’m Hook. Pleasure to make your acquaintance. We should have you out of here in no time. Hop up on the berth for me.”

Starscream tried not to let his disdain show on his faceplate, but instead focused on quietly obeying the medic. The medic unspooled a medical cable and handed it to Starscream to plug into his port on his wrist. “Is there something you are looking for?” Starscream asked, trying to mask his suspicion.

Hook smiled behind his blue visor. “Ah well we have had in the past former Autobot prisoners come back with nasty things in the processors, or maybe even overrides slipped in there to make some kind of sleeper agent. We just are operating with an overabundance of caution.” The medic’s optics were dimmed as he ran a few diagnostics.

Starscream relaxed a little at that. He could happily ignore this little escapade and think about his next steps-

“Quite a bit of weaponry you have on you, don’t ya.”

Starscream closed his optics in irritation and then opened them with a practiced polite smile on his faceplate. “Is that odd in a time of war?” he said sweetly.

Hook shrugged. “Maybe a little odd for a Decepticon aerial is all.” The seeker knew Skyfire was trying to make optic-contact with Starscream, but he was pointedly ignoring him.

Starscream narrowed his optics to slits. “And our dear second-in-command is odd then.”

Hook’s mouth twitched. “He and his trine are at least a rarity. But maybe not as rare as I thought,” Hook said tilting his head at Starscream. The red and white seeker stared down the medic with maybe more ferocity than was necessary. 

“Skyfire,” Hook clipped, breaking optic contact and retracting his medical cable with a snap. Starscream flinched and silently cursed himself. “Would you mind if I have a moment alone with Starshatter?”

Skyfire looked between them and paled but nodded. “Of course,” he said, walking away to the far side of the medical bay. Starscream watched him go with annoyance and then turned to the medic who was watching him carefully.

“You’ve… been through quite a bit, haven’t you,” he said, folding his arms across his chassis.

Starscream said nothing but hardened his jaw.

“I’m seeing multiple wounds repaired multiple times, some of them… quite traumatic, I’d imagine. When did you lose a servo?”

Starscream lifted and looked at said servo irritably. “Oh, less than a vorn ago I suppose,” he said airily. “Autobot captors and all that.”

“Yes, well, the problem with that story, Starshatter, is that I recognize these exact kinds of wounds. The angle and the chemical makeup are the same, as I’ve repaired them multiple times on another patient. They came from one mech in particular.”

Starscream kept very still as he looked at this medic that was far too smart for his liking. “I’m not sure what you’re getting at,” he said as politely as he could stomach.

“Well the issue is said attacking mech has been here with the Decepticons for a lot longer than the past _vorn_. So unless there is something about him that has… regressed, which I _doubt_ , then I’m left with some question glyphs about you.”

Starscream was not about to be rattled by this bot. “Hmm, I understand your confusion then, Hook. You have quite a conundrum on your servos trying to explain my _trauma_ to yourself.” He sat up in the berth and swung his legs over the side. “While you figure it out, do you mind if I get back to living my life _despite_ it?”

“My only concern is for the welfare of my patients, which could include you someday. The Autobots have done stranger plots than whatever this could be.”

Starscream glared. “I’ll be sure to tell them that next time they are beating me senseless. I’m sure they’ll be very interested in your conspiracy theories.”

Hook stared coolly at Starscream. “Have a pleasant day, Starshatter. Hope I don’t see you anytime soon,” he smirked.

Starscream hopped off the berth. “Pleasure meeting you, Hook. The feeling is mutual,” he said as he walked away, trying to stop himself from kicking the nearest piece of medical equipment on his way out of the med bay. He stalked right past Skyfire without a glance.

The shuttle was about to go after the seeker, but Hook had appeared next to him. “I’m hearing that you are vouching for him? I know he’s not telling us the whole truth,” he said. 

Skyfire frowned. “He’s not… easy to get along with. But he’s not a danger to us.”

Hook sighed. “I just don’t want this to blow up in your face. Being associated with him sounds likely to backfire.”

Skyfire narrowed his optics. “Is that going in your official report Hook, or is he considered to be medically cleared?”

Hook frowned. “He’s cleared.”

Skyfire nodded. “Thanks,” he said turning and walking out.

* * *

Starscream didn’t get very far. He still didn’t know the base very well and despite wanting to get as far away from the medical bay as possible, he also didn’t want to lose his guide. 

At the same time, he didn’t really feel like talking to Skyfire right now. He had been so happy to see the shuttle again, once he knew it was actually him and not Jetfire. But things were not that simple.

It was odd to him that Jetfire looked _exactly_ like Skyfire, from the paint and the blue optics, down to the shuttle make and model. The Starscream of this universe actually had quite a few distinguishing features from his own frame. The resemblance was uncanny, but not exact. There might be something to that.

And Starscream underestimated the cunning of these Autobot-like Decepticons. They were no mere fools. He felt scrutinized at every turn from the irritatingly sincere Shockwave and Soundwave, their terrible berth-side-manner medic Hook, and maybe even the Starscream of this universe as well. Even Skyfire had given him slag for joining the Decepticons, even though he had made that decision with _his_ blessing-

No. 

Not his blessing. At _Jetfire’s_ encouragement.

He huffed his vents. This was getting ridiculous. Starscream prided himself on weaving lies and plots together to get a desired outcome, but here he had no allies other than a tentative friend in _his_ version of the shuttle. There were lies on top of lies here, and he still didn’t understand how it all fit together. He didn’t understand the background stories, the relationships…

Yes. That. Starscream had noticed how Skyfire looked at this universe’s Starscream. Seemed he had moved on… nicely. He sighed. He wasn’t here to rekindle anything or get jealous of a pretty pair of wings. He wasn’t supposed to be _here_ in the first place.

But he knew Jetfire wanted to be here. That was something he could work with.

He just had to bide his time. Jetfire would find a way to get back into his universe and presumably… back to his Starscream. Then he could find a way to destroy him.

Skyfire came around the bend and Starscream frowned.

“Star, are you okay? What did he say to you?” he said jogging towards him.

Starscream felt his initial anger… melt a little. Skyfire had nothing to do with any of this. All he had done was follow Starscream on a stupid exploration mission and got himself whisked away into another dimension like some kind of warped fairy tale. Stupid shuttle.

“I promise, I will get him to apologize to you if he said anything he shouldn’t have,” he said, still closing the distance between them.

Stupid… kind-hearted shuttle.

“Please, talk to me,” Skyfire said, panting. He was leaning forward on his knees so that his faceplate was extremely close to Starscream’s.

Starscream blushed a little but just looked down. “It’s nothing. Really,” he said knowing he didn’t sound convincing. “I just didn’t like him asking questions about my weapons.”

Skyfire smiled in a way that Starscream could _feel_ it before he saw it. No one he knew smiled like that around him. “Oh good, if that’s all. Hook is often paranoid and can be abrasive. He really is a good medic though,” Skyfire said, righting himself so he was at his full height.

But Starscream still had something eating away at his spark.

“Why is it, no matter what universe I’m in, I don’t fit in?”

Skyfire drew back with surprise. “What?” he said, his smile faltering as he tilted his helm. 

Starscream scowled. “Skyfire. He said I had too many weapons for a _flightframe_. Does this universe suffer from functionalist slag as well?”

Skyfire blanched. “I… suppose most of the aerials are scientists, engineers, and mathematicians. It hadn’t really occurred to me.”

Starscream bit back a retort. Of course he didn’t notice. He fit right in. Starscream had struggled at their science academy back in Iacon in their own universe because he was a seeker, and seekers were meant to be _warriors_. Starscream had been considered far too uppity for a seeker when he had shown interest in science.

Here it seemed to be the opposite. 

Starscream sighed. “Fine, just. Fine,” Starscream said angrily. “I’ll be leaving soon anyway.”

Skyfire looked like he was about to say something in reply when a loud alarm started going off in the hallway. Then an announcement came over the comms:

“Attention all Decepticon Personnel; Autobots sighted at coordinates 38.085730, 23.787540. Proceed to muster stations to repel.”

Skyfire grabbed Starscream’s servo and started running.

* * *

“You don’t have to help if you don’t want to,” Skyfire said, grabbing a blaster from the armory. Everyone had always been so surprised when he didn’t like using energy swords or daggers. He always replied he didn’t like to get that close to fighting.

“Are you kidding? I’ve wanted to fight since I got here,” Starscream said. 

How different they still were.

Starscream was practically vibrating with pent up energy. Skyfire had always seen this in the smaller seeker; that despite his comparably diminutive frame, he seemed to have the energy of a bigger mech just jammed into his lines. It was a little frightening to Skyfire that he was this excited about battle though. It seemed the gap that had separated them had only grown while they were apart.

Their muster station group was led by one of the Conehead trine, Thrust. He was giving them orders to engage if only if necessary and leave the bulk of the fighting to the forward group of Combaticons. Fliers were to take to the air and help with reconnaissance.

As soon as they were dismissed, Starscream shot into the air, ignoring every single one of the commands they had just been issued.

Skyfire sighed.

* * *

Starscream felt his trinemates fall into formation behind him. From their vantage point above the battle, they could see the various battled beginning to form and seeing where they could go as needed. 

The Autobots had spread out, trying to distract them. It was clear that the main forces of the battle were Rodimus and Wheeljack, though Starscream had to bury some resentment that Optimus Prime still hadn’t made an appearance. If he had, then maybe Megatron would return.

Though the thought of seeing Prime again did not sit well with him either.

“Hey Star, this new aerial is pretty good,” Skywarp said, interrupting his thoughts.

Starscream moved his sensors across the battlefield and found Starshatter, blasting some Autobots then quickly transforming away. He was like the wind, twisting, firing, and then flying off to find a new target. It was almost feverish in intensity.

“Keep an eye on him, will you? He looks likes he’s trying to prove something,” Starscream said with irritation over the comm.

Right as Skywarp was about to acknowledge, they were joined in the air by two Autobots with jetpacks.

“S-slag-“ Skywarp said, twisting out of the way and firing a volley at the twins, Sunstreaker and Sideswipe. Thundercracker snarled as he turned his guns on the twins as well. They laughed, dodging effortlessly.

“Heya Starscream! Missed you, pretty bird. Prime sends his regards,” Sunstreaker said bringing out a stasis net from subspace. 

Starscream transformed into root. “Really. I’ve heard he hasn’t been seen for some time,” he said with a hard stare. He tensed and prepared to move quickly, however this would pan out.

“Oh, he’s around. Don’t worry your pretty little head about it,” Sideswipe said, trying to move wide around the three aerials. Sideswipe then snickered and then did a fake out, making the three of the aerials flinch, but it was Skywarp who over-corrected. 

Sunstreaker tensed to throw the net, but was stopped when a pede collided with his helm from up above.

His “What the slag-“ was drowned out by maniacal laughter as he plummeted out of the sky, the net falling on himself in the process. Sideswipe swore and turned on his thrusters, attempting to grapple with the new aerial.

Starshatter easily flew out of his reach, taunting him along the way.

“Come now, Autobot, if you come into the skies, you need to make sure you are prepared for the consequences!” 

Sideswipe snarled, pulling out a sword and going for Starshatter in earnest. The red and white aerial seemed intrigued by the sword, but still had an arrogant smirk on his face.

Starscream was irritated by the mech’s attitude but was also a little impressed. Just… a little.

The Elite trine was moved into action, all three in their bi-pedal forms. In this form, they had swords on the tips of their wings and quickly started to attack Sideswipe. The mech managed to parry most of the attacks, but was quickly overwhelmed and dashed to try and get away.

Starshatter moved to intercept, but Starscream reached out a servo on his shoulder. “Let him go. The he’s lost.”

Starshatter frowned. “Are we not proud Decepticons? Destroying the Autobots should be paramount. He can just come back to kill you later.”

Starscream didn’t particularly like the tone the aerial had, but it was TC who responded. “We are trying to beat them with our ideology, not lose it in the process,” he said.

Starshatter seemed to have noticed TC for the first time and had an odd look on his faceplate. Then his optics moved to the third trinemate, Skywarp. It looked like Starshatter was stricken.

“Quite the terror you are,” Skywarp said, arching an optic-ridge.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Starshatter said. It was like his intensity dimmed a little.

“It was intended as one,” Skywarp said, flicking his wings a little with a smirk. Starscream almost groaned. He knew that look. 

“Are you trined?” Starscream asked

“I was,” Starshatter said, pulling his optics from Skywarp finally.

Starscream sighed. “I’m sorry. This war has taken far too much from us.”

Starshatter looked down at the battle below. “What’s their target?”

“They’re constantly running out of fuel, so they keep trying to come back and steal ours. If we don’t stop them, they’ll go deeper into the galaxy.” 

“You _want_ to keep them nearby?” Starshatter asked incredulously.

“We are trying to keep an eye on them, yes. They’ll cause less issues that way,” Starscream said, flaring his wings out in a stretch. “Come’on gentlemechs, let’s rain some more _terror_ down on these ‘bots,” he said with a small smile.

Skywarp whooped loudly and transformed flying off. Starscream and TC transformed, following, with Starshatter taking up a temporary position as fourth.

It felt oddly right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Please let me know if jumping between “Starscreams” gets confusing. I have one POV jump here that I tried to make obvious, but I still want to ask.
> 
> -Also, Hook- VICTIM BLAMING IS NOT OKAY. But I promise you there is some reason as to why he's acting like an aft. We will get there!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry about the late update- same on my other fics too. Had a wedding to attend this weekend, so I didn't get my usual writing done :)
> 
> Thanks again [@OverlordRaax](https://archiveofourown.org/users/OverlordRaax/pseuds/OverlordRaax) for giving it a once-over.

Jetfire sat in the Ark, glaring out the window at the icy tundra they had landed on. Power had been restored and Prime had managed to smooth things over with the organics. Somehow.

He stared toward where the portal was. He had managed to convince the Autobots that he had offlined Starscream and that the seeker had fallen down into a crevasse and luckily he had not alerted the other Decepticons to their location. That had been a guess, but a good one; Starscream was too prideful to let anyone help him.

Jetfire was angry, but more at himself. He had been so close to going back to his universe, his life, instead of this fake one he had been enduring for the past few millennia. The shuttle could practically feel the repaint he was about to get of black paint with blue-purple detailing and finally feeling like _himself_ again. He’d been pretending to be this Skyfire for far longer than he had intended.

Instead, Starscream had taken his place.

Now he had to wait four more decacycles before the portal would open again. Four more decacycles where this universe’s Starscream could potentially gain the upper hand at home.

He knew Starscream would know that returning was his goal. The accursed seeker was probably planning for it and causing him all kinds of problems for when he got back. It brought him some small solace that he’d likely hear that Skyfire was _dead_ and he’d figure out that Jetfire had indeed disposed of his alter self to make things more… tidy. He wondered if the seeker would be sparkbroken.

Jetfire loathed the part of himself that would want to comfort him.

It had not been his intention to get rid of Skyfire, it had just been business. The shuttle of this universe had been his way in. He had started dabbling with alternate universes as a potential energy source, and Wheeljack had stuck his finials in to try and learn more. Before long, he had the blessing of the Prime himself and resources and aide. It was to be his only project. 

He found several paths to other universes but found that the barrier was thinnest where his own counterpart existed. And in this universe, his counterpart was staying still making it even easier. There had been a couple of others to choose from, but he had set the coordinates to random between them and this is where he ended up. When he had arrived, he discovered that his counterpart had a completely different paint scheme than he did, and he was frozen in an icy block. Also, unlike his universe, there was no stellar spanner that could quickly get him back to this universe's Cybertron.

And then the portal flickered.

In fear, he jumped back to his universe, realizing that the connection was tenuous at best. He could not reactivate it no matter how hard he tried. It needed a specific resonance frequency, only achievable on a certain day and time every four decacyles, and even then, it only activated for a moment. But the connection made and the portal established, he found he no longer needed access to his counterpart’s comatose body, and he began to plan.

He had informed the Prime of his success, and the Prime seemed oddly… obsessed. He gave Jetfire his full approval and the shuttle was to check in on occasion by sending databursts to the portal every four decacyles. Ready to depart, he repainted himself, changed his optics, and prepared.

And when he stepped back through the portal, he made sure that Skyfire was sent back into the… _loving_ embrace of his comrades. He can only imagine what happened to him. Remembering how Rodimus had said he had been “dealt with” still gave him pause.

“Hey Jetfire,” he heard a voice, breaking him out of his thoughts. “Optimus is lookin’ for ya,” the Wheeljack of this universe said. “Says he’s got something to show ya.”

The shuttle suppressed a scowl. “Thank you Wheeljack. He’s in the control room?”

“Actually, he’s in the demoded storage bay.”

Jetfire knit his brows slightly. Odd place for him. “Very well. Thank you.”

He rose and walked out to greet this joke of a Prime.

* * *

Starscream watched the complete trine ahead of him with no small note of bitterness in his spark. Of _course_ there was a Skywarp in this universe. Of _course_ there would be a TC as well.

Thundercracker. Slag. 

: _You alright back there?_ : came the comm from his own counterpart. The perfect Starscream.

“Of course,” he replied. “Flying fourth is just new.”

 _:We have several broken trines:_ the aerial continued. _:We would be happy to introduce you-:_

“Oh, no thank you,” Starscream replied hastily. He hoped it came off as… emotional. Not disgusted. Broken trines were full of grieving, sniveling-

Ah. Well.

 _:Of course_ : he heard the aerial reply lightly, as if the white and red jet didn’t have a care in the world.

: _Autobots ahead:_ TC said. With a graceful, in-canon turn, this Elite Trine made their descent and transformed. Starscream noticed their pauldron-attached wings had bladed attachments on them. He realized they were reminiscent of Jetfire’s wrist blade. 

Starscream did the equivalent of a sneer in his jet-mode. Jetfire had often asked him to modify his wings in just such a manner. The seeker entertained the idea at first if only to placate his lover, but as time went on he found the obsession with modifying his frame for the shuttle revolting. Now, in seeing what Jetfire was attempting to mold him to was flying before him, he felt his plating crawl.

But then he noticed the darling second-in-command of the Decepticons do one last turn-flourish in bi-pedal form, looking back into the sky. Just as quickly he had turned back to the Autobots below.

Starscream realized he was scanning the skies for someone, likely out of habit. Starscream found himself doing the same thing.

* * *

Skyfire was an average shot with the blaster, but he wasn’t a huge fan of using it. His bulk made him easier as a hands-on defender and so he often stationed himself right outside the Decepticon base trying to prevent anyone from attempting to get inside. Today, apparently, was a day the Autobots wanted to mess with him.

“Oh _look_ it’s _Sky_ fire,” he heard Goldbug say, overly enunciating the first syllable of his name.

“Oh, how ya doing, buddy?!” he heard another voice say. “Been a long time, big bot!” Blurr.

Skyfire rolled his optics. “Gentlemechs. Didn’t expect to see you today,” he said whipping around with a kick. Both mechs jumped out of the way with a yelp of surprise.

“Believe it or not, we just wanted to talk!“

“You know, we being old friends and all,” Blurr said, giving Goldbug a conspiratorial look. The two of them began circling Skyfire on opposite sides.

Skyfire never understood their jokes. He felt like he was always missing something. “You know, I don’t really have time for this,” he said. 

“Okay, okay, look, look, we just wanted to know about the new aerial. Rodimus is pissed, and it has a lot to do with him,” Blurr said.

“ _Why_ would I even want to _entertain_ answering you -“

“Ah! Because we’ll let you capture us. Make it look _real_ good and all. You don’t even have to beat us up!” Goldbug said with a fanged grin. “We know how you _abhor violence_.” There was a cackle from Blurr on the other side.

Skyfire narrowed his optics. “I’m going to have to go with no on this one.”

“You know,” Goldbug said. “They’re never going to fully trust you. Not _really_.”

“I mean, you used to _be_ one of us! Our beloved Jetfire!”

“And you _really_ fragged up when you hurt their precious star aerial before you lost your memories,” Goldbug continued. “They fragging love that guy.”

“So you could probably use all the help you can get to get into their good graces, amiright?” Blurr said, feinting in like he was going to attack. Skyfire didn’t flinch.

Skyfire's lips pursed in a line. “And there is no reason why you two would _want_ to be captured and brought into our base,” Skyfire said flatly, his sensors on full alert and tracking the two Autobots.

“He’s got a point there, ‘Bug.”

“Okay but the word is you _know_ something about the pretty tri-color jet. He just appears out of nowhere and suddenly he’s your best buddy following you around everywhere, I mean _that’s_ not suspicious at _all_ ….” Goldbug said prolonging the last word.

Skyfire froze. “How would you know he’s following me everywhere?”

The two Autobots froze in their circling. “You know what? We’ll just go ask him ourselves,” Goldbug said, transforming and speeding off into the distance. Blurr cackled again and followed suit.

Skyfire watched them go, fear seizing his tanks. He threw his blaster into subspace and transformed getting into the sky as quickly as he could.

* * *

It was annoying not having any blasters. In his haste to get away from Hook, Starscream had neglected to get his null-rays and wing fixed, but luckily he was no less dangerous. He dive-bombed out of the sky, using his pedes and servos as blunt force objects against their Autobot foes. It certainly wasn’t as _precise_ as the flourishes and slashes of the Trine he fought alongside, but he was definitely doing as much damage.

Two new bots appeared and seemed to take particular interest in him. One looked vaguely familiar but he didn’t really care to figure it out. Like most grounders, they seemed particularly interested in grabbing his wings, so he was constantly losing ground to them as he backed off and made sure they couldn’t get to them. With no real weapons other than his frame (which was _enough,_ mind you), he had to rely on servo-to-servo combat. He preferred hitting things at a distance but sparring with seekers and even Jetfire had made him proficient.

Ah. But it wasn’t his wings they were after. They wanted to separate him on the battlefield. _Clever_.

“Is there something I can do for you?” he asked, pulling into the air above the two mechs. He looked down his nose at them in his patented sneer.

The yellow colored one seemed to relax. “Actually, yeah! Wondering if we could have a word. We were wondering if you knew what had happened to Jetfire?”

Starscream tilted his helm, his optics blazing. “Did something happen to him? Because if it did, I swear to you-“

“No, no, don’t get your ailerons in a twist,” the blue one said. “Not _that_ one. _Jetfire.”_

“Because… You’re _Starscream_ , right?” the yellow one said.

Starscream held his intakes for a moment. Then he narrowed his optics and then grinned darkly. “Were you _expecting_ him?”

“Actually, yeah,” said the blue one.

“ _So_ sorry to disappoint you. I just _had_ to spoil his plans.”

The yellow one tilted his head. “But we thought you two were working… _together_.”

“Yes, that’s what his last update said, Goldbug. Or maybe it was more like… he had you under _control_.”

“Was that the word, Blurr? I remember it being meaner.”

“Oh, right! It was more like _submission-_ “

But the blue one didn’t have a chance to finish before he was being throttled by the seeker. Starscream took some small delight in the panic rampant in the Autobot’s optics, but the bot “Goldbug” was pretty fast as well. In a flash, the yellow and black mech was on his wings, tearing and scraping as best he could. 

Starscream shot into the air as fast and as hard as his thrusters would burn, and then began a sickening spiral upwards. Goldbug’s servos clenched onto the tips of his wings, trying to find purchase to hold on to, but having trouble. He was flung off. 

As he fell, he twisted and pulled out two blasters, firing at Starscream as gravity took him back. Starscream moved the struggling form of Blurr to block the blaster fire as a shield. Blurr snarled in pain and glared at Starscream.

“If you _do_ see Jetfire again,” Starscream said with a smirk, pulling the blue mech in close. “…tell him I’m waiting for him.” 

And then he dropped the Autobot. He would probably survive. Starscream didn’t care too much.

He heard the sound of an approaching shuttle, and he tensed every connector in his frame. When the shuttle transformed and he saw the worried face of Skyfire, he exvented heavily.

“Two Autobots said they were coming for you,” he said, looking over the seeker. His optics rested on his damaged wings, servos and pedes. “Primus, Star, are you alright?”

Starscream felt his fluttering spark finally begin to relax. “Just… doin’ great,” he said tiredly. He closed his optics and felt a rush of exhaustion take over his frame. This was the third battle he’d been in since the last time he had recharged. He was running on fumes.

A gentle presence wrapped around him and he wanted to flail out of the hold, to twist away, to hit the thing that was supporting him in the sky. At the same time he wanted to lean into it, embrace it, grasp it and never let it go. But he was too tired to do anything.

“Let’s get you patched up,” Skyfire said, pulling him closer.

* * *

Jetfire walked the dark corridors of the Ark. These lower hallways had been considered too obsolete to power or light, so it was cold and dark. The shuttle felt like it reminded him of this universe’s Decepticon stronghold. 

He eventually reached the demoded storage bay. Optimus was looking over a small datapad in his servo and didn’t look up when Jetfire entered the room.

“You wanted to see me, sir?” he asked, trying to hold back his annoyance at being summoned like a servant.

Still, Optimus didn’t acknowledge him. He flicked through something on the pad and kept reading.

Jetfire narrowed his optics. “Is there something you needed from me?” he asked again.

“No, Jetfire, you have been quite helpful to me,” Optimus said, slowly looking up from the datapad. “I wonder why now your competence is slipping.”

Jetfire pulled back in surprise. “My competence- what do you mean?” he asked, slightly angry. He had given Optimus every victory he had achieved so far. What was this mech talking about?

“Did you enjoy playing with the aerial that looked so much like the one back home? Was he the one that distracted you from checking in?”

Jetfire froze.

The word “aerial” was one that was not one used in this universe to talk about flightframes. That word was usually the word “seeker.”

Optimus looked at him… strangely. He looked no different than the Optimus he had been working with since he had defected, but there was something that had fallen away from his countenance. A fluid relaxation. As if not… acting.

“…Prime,” he said with regret.

The Prime watched him with interest. “I’m glad I didn’t have to spell it out for you.”

Jetfire’s mind was reeling. “How… long?” he asked.

“Shortly after the war here started. It took me a while to get back to Cybertron of course, but it was quite easy to take his place.” He tapped a button on a nondescript storage unit.

A stasis chamber emerged from the wall with the Optimus Prime of this universe in deep stasis. His frame was much less marred than the Prime’s and he looked… younger.

Jetfire watched the Prime from his universe carefully, now seeing every mannerism, every vocal tic, every part of him that explained who he really was. Jetfire could not believe he had been deceived.

A voice in his processor laughed derisively. It sounded like Starscream.

“But why did you come here? I… apologize for not checking in, sir. I was-“

“Busy, yes, I _know_ ,” he said irritably. “It’s always you and that pair of wings, isn’t it? Luckily, I didn’t really need any more intelligence from you. I have obtained what I came for,” he said, pulling something out of subspace.

It was the AllSpark.

Jetfire’s lines went cold as he realized the Prime’s plan. “You intend to revive Cybertron.”

“I liked your original idea. Scan alternate universes for their energy, _take them_ , and incorporate them into our own. Ultimately, destroying our AllSpark from our universe was… short sighted of me. But this one will bring our Cybertron back to life.”

Dooming the one here, Jetfire thought.

“Tell me, is your little aerial going to mess up our return? I don’t need any loose ends, Jetfire.”

Jetfire frowned. “I’ll take care of him.”

“See that you do. Before I do it for you.” Prime's optics glittered with expectation.

Jetfire bowed at the waist at the mech before him. “All hail Optimus Prime.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And just to heap on the praise, a big thank you to Raax again for helping me with the idea about Prime ;) 
> 
> Thanks for reading, kudo-ing, and commenting! Brings me joy ;)


	7. Chapter 7

Starscream onlined slowly in a medical berth, which was odd because it was a really, _really_ nice one, and he was pretty sure that Shockwave had requisitioned all of the nice medical berths for his experiments-masquerading-as-clinical-trials. Since the seekers were the most often damaged part of the army, he had complained to Megatron of course, but Jetfire had headed him off and told Megatron he was just whining.

So was he being experimented on? He couldn’t have been out for more than a few hours, that surely wasn’t enough time for Shockwave to concoct something nefarious-

Jetfire was talking to him, saying something with that terrible mouth. 

Starscream primed his null-rays, feeling the heating metal ping as it quickly expanded. Then Jetfire reached out a servo to grab him, hurt him-

“Ah, Skyfire, do you mind if I have a moment alone with Starshatter?” came the voice of the medic, Hook.

And everything came back with a flood of remembrance. 

He quickly deactivated his null-rays and manually untensed every connector under his plating. Skyfire looked more than concerned but nodded. “I’ll be right over there,” the shuttle said, pointing. Starscream nodded mutely as Skyfire retreated to the doorway, watching Hook carefully.

The medic sat down on a stool next to the berth. “I… uh owe you an apology,” he started, his blue visor pulsing slightly. 

Starscream never trusted apologies.

“I made a grave error,” the medic continued. “Your injuries matched Starscream’s so accurately, I thought that maybe it was trick. To gain his trust or pity. But… you clearly have met Jetfire… likely at his worst,” he said glancing at Skyfire again. “And you were a great boon to us today during the battle.”

Starscream leaned his helm back, still watching the medic but saying nothing. He had been repaired, and though he still felt a little sluggish, he was itching to get discharged and out of the medical bay and away from its too-soft berths and oddly-kind medical staff.

“Skyfire has done his best to fit in around here,” Hook continued, even without encouragement. “There are many mechs who still don’t want him around, but I know he’s different. He helped me evacuate a neutral medical hospital and didn’t care if anyone knew what he had done. I just didn’t want him to fall under any more suspicion with strange aerials who fall into our laps.”

Starscream listened, not really caring how the medic justified himself or apologized. He was tiny, in the scheme of things. But it was interesting that he got confirmation that Starscream had been the mech who had been injured before him, and that Skyfire was not well-liked here.

Maybe he should try to convince him to leave after all. If by force if necessary.

“I understand Hook,” Starscream said quietly. “You all have… been through a lot,” he said, grimacing through the saccharine sentiment. He then began to sit up. “I was hoping-”

“Oh yes, you are cleared,” Hook said. “You probably don’t want to miss the party. I wouldn’t dare hold you up. Just, take it easy, okay?”

Starscream nodded, getting off the berth and walked towards Skyfire. He mouthed the word “party” like it tasted terrible on his glossa. These Decepticons really _were_ pathetic Autobots.

Skyfire was leaning against the wall and looked him over appraisingly. “Hook did a better job, this time,” he said with a trace of annoyance. “Are you doing alright?” he asked as they walked away.

Starscream had hoped that Skyfire had missed his strange reaction upon waking, but it appeared he hadn’t. If he was going to convince the shuttle to come back to his universe with him, he was going to need to steel his emotions and find a way to separate Skyfire from Jetfire.

It was impossibly difficult. He had thought they were one and the same for millennia.

“Starscream?” Skyfire said, noticing his hesitation.

The seeker nodded. “Sorry, yes, I’m fine,” he said. “I woke up and thought I was somewhere else. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

Skyfire stopped walking and frowned. “Starscream, why do you keep lying to me?”

The seeker stopped walking too and turned to face the angry tone the shuttle had. Skyfire’s face was confused, hurt, and frustrated. “Why do you think I’m-“

“I know you!” Skyfire said. “I _know_ when you are lying. I know you were really upset when Hook talked to you before, and it wasn’t just about your weapons, but you lied to me about it. You keep saying you’re fine, but you tense when I’m near you. You treat me like… like _they_ do.”

Starscream felt his spark pounding in his chest but tried to still it. He wasn’t ready to have this conversation. “And how is that?” he croaked out. But he knew the answer.

“Like I’m… _him_. Jetfire. The mech who’s shadow I’m under,” Skyfire replied, closing his optics for moment. “Their reaction I understand. It’s taken me a long time but I finally have earned their trust. But you,” he said affixing the seeker with his piercing blue optics, “are _hiding_ something from me.”

Starscream knew the best way to avoid talking about yourself was to deflect. “Well, what about you? I know _you_ too, Skyfire! You’re lying every day, and it’s _killing_ you! Why in the Pit have you maintained this lie? Just tell them who you are!”

“I already told you-“

“It’s easier. I get it. But when have you _ever_ just done the easy thing when the _moral_ thing was within your grasp, Skyfire? What possible benefit could there be to be pretending to be an amnesiac version of a manipulative, photovoltaic piece of slag-”

But Starscream stopped himself, realizing he was giving away that he knew what Jetfire was like.

“Whoa, _language_ ,” Starscream heard a new voice say. It was Thundercracker coming up behind them, followed by Skywarp and… _him_.

And for the black-helmed Starscream, some things suddenly fell into place. Now that he was well-rested and repaired, he was thinking clearly, and he could sense the change in Skyfire’s demeanor around his counterpart. He had guessed that Skyfire was falling for the aerial, but it seemed it was why he was lying about who he was too. Pretending to be a reformed Jetfire allowed him to have a past with the aerial, but also gave this Starscream what he had likely always wanted: a kind and gentle version of Jetfire.

The seeker could have told them it likely wouldn’t work out based on his experience. But fine. Good luck.

“Apologies, Thundercracker,” Stars _hatter_ said, his crafted mask of lies back on. “I should not have gotten so heated.”

“Is everything alright?” the perfect Starscream asked, looking at Skyfire with concern. 

And Skyfire looked like he melted. 

It really did hurt the seeker. He could admit that deep inside his spark. Everyone he had cared about seemed to want the aerial, but found the seeker wanting. 

“Everything is fine,” Starshatter said. “Just old disagreements raising their ugly helms,” he added, his smile languid. “I heard that there was a party?”

“Oh yeah, we were coming to find you,” Skywarp said, moving forward and slipping his arm under his, locking at the elbows. “Wanted to make sure you were there, since you were such a big help!” Skywarp said with a laugh and started walking forward with Starshatter in tow, chattering lightly. Thundercracker was following right behind.

This universe’s Starscream was watching Skyfire with a soft look. “Skywarp will distract him if you need a break,” he said.

“That isn’t necessary, I was the one who was out of line,” Skyfire said regretfully.

The aerial nodded. “Well, if you ever need anything. You know, I am here,” he said with a soft smile and placed a light servo on his arm. The contact was brief, as if the second-in-command realized what he had done and pulled back quickly, confusion on his faceplate. He smiled briefly then followed after the rest of his trine to the refueling hall.

But for Skyfire, some things finally fell into place. Both of the Starscreams in his life had the same reaction to his presence; they were tense but trying to force themselves to relax. There was a commonality here.

Jetfire.

The black-helmed Starscream had interacted with Jetfire at some point; of that, Skyfire was now sure. Skyfire didn’t know how it would be possible, but it made sense somehow. From the time Starscream had seen him in the interrogation room, to just now when he woke up in the med-bay, Jetfire seemed to be on the mind of his Starscream.  
  
And the thought made him realize he was an idiot.

* * *

In the grand refueling hall, mechs were chatting and smiling, recounting stories of the past battle. It had been a while since they had to repel Autobots from Cybertron, as there wasn’t much left of the planet worth plundering. Still, the victory was a much-needed morale boost for the Decepticons.

Starscream suppressed a scowl. The perfect Starscream had been deposited at the front of the refueling hall and asked to give a speech.

“My friends and comrades, this was a victory, and we could not have done it without your help. To lost friends, to old friends, and to new friends. To Cybertron!” The throng of gathered Decepticons cheered heartily and slapped each other on the backs in delight.

Short speech. Could’ve been longer.

“Hey.”

Starscream turned and almost jumped out of his plating. He then composed himself and inclined his helm. “Skywarp.”

“Oh sorry, did I scare you?” the aerial said with a smirk. “Didn’t think the one who saved me from the Autobots would be so jumpy.”

Starscream nodded. “Autobots don’t make me jumpy. Your reputation for… pranks precedes you,” he said, giving himself permission to smile. It was a guess, but it was probably true.

“Whatever they have told you is a lie, and a terrible attack on my character,” the aerial said, placing a mocking servo on his chest plate. “Unless they were good things,” he said with a wink.

Starscream smiled softly. This was… well it was definitely strange. But it was also… nice.

“Do you want to get out of here?” Skywarp said, taking a step closer. He was white where his Skywarp had been black, and he seemed to have more friendliness than sadism, but it was clear he was still Skywarp.

“What did you have in mind?”

“Go flying, for starters.”

Starscream smiled wider. “Sure. If you can keep up with me.”

“Yeah I gathered that was a problem,” Skywarp muttered. “Wouldn’t mind giving it a shot, though.”

Starscream’s smile slowly faded. This was fun, but it was more than he deserved. He didn’t have a right to see Skywarp again, not while Jetfire still lived.

Skywarp looked concerned. “Sorry, too forward?”

Starscream cleared his vocalizer. “No, no. It’s just… I want to be fair to you. You remind me of someone.”

“Oh, I don’t mind,” Skywarp replied with a lascivious smirk. 

“ _Definitely_ remind me of someone,” Starscream said with a laugh. “But I would love to go for a fly,” he said tilting his helm. For the first time since he got to this other universe, he felt disarmed and… wanted. He would allow himself to indulge the feeling, even if just for another moment.

Skywarp took his servo and lightly pulled him out of the party and towards the hangar.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the wait, and thank you to my loyal fans of this particular yarn who keep telling me they want to know what happens. I love you all.

Skywarp was an exuberant flying partner, and Starscream internally smiled as he matched the other’s jet’s twists and turns in the air. He jetted forward to take the lead over the barren landscape of this Cybertron and could feel the sensor net of the other glide over his frame appreciatively. Starscream laughed and dipped his wings in a friendly “thanks for noticing.”

It was quite dark out there. Cybertron back home had been rife with light pollution in comparison. Or at least it did. Before it started to die.

He felt Skywarp falter in the air behind him a little as a crosswind caught his aileron.

“I told you, you always have to keep up you wings! If I told you once I’ve told you hundreds of times-”

Starscream stopped himself, then sighed. There was stunned and surprised silence from the other mech.

“Sorry,” Starscream said. He felt numb all of a sudden as all of his mirth was suddenly sucked out of him. 

This… this was wrong. 

He banked away and went to land on an escarpment that was overlooking sandy dunes that stretched for miles in any direction.

He heard the transformation of the other jet land behind him but respectfully keep his distance.

“Was… it the other mech? The one I remind you of?”

Starscream nodded without turning around, looking out across the night sky.

Skywarp came up to stand beside him. Starscream could feel his gentle gaze, and again he was struck with how unfair everything was and how he did _not_ deserve this. 

“I told you I didn’t mind,” Skywarp said.

Starscream smiled softly and turned to the aerial who was just like his dead trinemate. “I know you did. And I appreciate it. But I think I do… mind.”

Skywarp looked a little disappointed but hid it well, nodding with a smile. “He must be a lucky mech then to have captured your ember so.”

Starscream let the comment glide over his audials and nodded. “Something like that.”

* * *

Skyfire was looking for “Starshatter” but no one had seen where he went. He desperately needed to clear the air and understand what had happened to Starscream during the time they’d been apart. Skyfire had been so wrong about the seeker’s motivations and at the very least Skyfire wanted to…

Well… what _did_ he want to tell Starscream?

Things between them might have been over a long time ago, but they had ended in more like a whimper than an explosion. They had been so sure of one-another, so resolute in their fiery romance that had swept them both away before they realized that maybe they had a lot less compatibility than initially thought. Starscream enjoyed bending rules and manipulating people, whereas Skyfire enjoyed abiding by those rules and helping those same people. Still, they had found ways to make it work.

But alone together on a long voyage through space had brought all of their failings as a couple to light, and they had decided to take a break.

Or… Skyfire had decided to. It was becoming clear that Starscream did not feel the same way about their separation. And while Skyfire hated hurting anyone, it had taken him far too long to put his own needs and wants above others, and he knew that he had made the right decision.

But Starscream had changed. For the better or for the worse, he wasn’t quite sure.

“Oh, yeah, I think he and Skywarp got out of here a little while ago,” Thundercracker said. Then the aerial gave him another look. “That’s… not a problem, is it?”

Skyfire apparently hadn’t schooled his features to hide his shock. “Oh, not a problem at all!” he said faking a smile. “I’m just surprised is all since it’s… Skywarp.”

TC smiled. “Starshatter helped us out on the battlefield in a big way. ‘Warp is just saying thank you in the way he knows best, I’m sure,” the blue aerial said with a laugh.

Skyfire couldn’t bring himself to laugh too.

“But you _know_ ,” TC said, taking his arm and turning him around to face the opposite direction. “There’s a different Star that I think would like to talk to you some more,” he said suggestively.

Skyfire followed his gaze and saw the blue optics of Starscream watching them with curiosity. TC stretched up on the tips of his pedes to lean into Skyfire’s audials. “I think this is your best shot, big guy,” he said with a smile.

Skyfire exvented before giving the blue seeker a smirk. “Playing double wingman tonight, I see, Thundercracker.”

The aerial snickered. “I am a humble servant to my trinemates’ happiness,” he said pulling away and giving the shuttle a gentle shove. “And believe it or not, I think you might be close to being _it_ for him.” Thundercracker walked away smiling.

Skyfire was surprised by these words. At first, Skywarp and Thundercracker had been cold to him just like everyone else in the Decepticon base. They kept a wary optic on him at all times and made sure that he couldn’t go near the white and red aerial.

It had not been an easy existence for Skyfire, but he found small victories in trying to win everyone over. They told him they had found him deep in stasis in an icy block deep in an Autobot base. His file said he had not been in the ice for very long, which was odd, as Skyfire’s chronometer told a very different story. Also, unnerving was that he showed signs of damage consistent with fighting with the Autobots.

Skyfire had thought this strange because he did not remember fighting anyone. The last thing he remembered was the panicked voice of a seeker in his audials as he drifted to stasis under layers of ice.

Still, the Decepticons treated him, and eventually (mostly) believed that he had amnesia from sometime before falling into the ice. It had been the truth at first, as Skyfire felt his mind jumbled and full of flashes of things that he wasn’t sure were quite real. He occasionally had visions of sharp, needly things, flashes of hurt and laughter, and even oddly his own self staring at him with confusion and disgust. Clearly, he had not been in ice the entire time, but he truly did not remember.

Eventually, these flashes dissipated. 

When he started to meet mechs that he somewhat recognized but not quite, he figured he had woken somewhere… else. The truth hadn’t become clear until he had met this new Starscream. Seeing him, talking to him… they were so similar, and yet different in important ways. After the aerial had talked with him and evaluated him, he had determined that Skyfire was telling the truth about his amnesia. It was only then that Skyfire began to relax into his new life.

It dawned on him that he liked this life better than the one he had had before, as complicated as it was. Here the scientists were appreciated, _revered_ even. Flightframes definitely held a place of honor in society rather than the thinly veiled suspicion he had been treated to back home. Things were honestly… good here.

Skyfire began to fear telling them the truth. He feared that he would lose what little faith had been restored in him and he would lose the friendships he had made, and they would try to send him home to his universe. Even if it were possible, he wasn’t ready to leave.

No. He had started over. 

And the Starscream of this universe definitely made him think he had made the right choice.

“Was Thundercracker bothering you?” said the aerial, his blue eyes looking suspiciously at the receding back of his trinemate. Skyfire had been so lost in thought that he hadn’t noticed Starscream approach.

“Not at all,” Skyfire said. “I was just asking him if he had seen Starshatter.”

Blue optics looked up at him from under the white helm with some slight surprise. “Oh? Is everything alright?”

Skyfire nodded. “Yes, I just… need to talk to him. Apologize. I think I made some assumptions about him that were a mistake.”

Starscream sighed. “That seems to be catching,” he said with slight bitterness. 

“Soundwave and Shockwave?” Skyfire said with amusement.

“Yes! How did you know? It’s like I’m their little brother not their commanding officer.”

“I suppose it means they care,” Skyfire said placatingly.

Starscream gave him an incredulous look. “Of course, but it feels… demeaning. Like everyone thinks I can’t take care of myself. It’s annoying.”

Skyfire nodded. “I suppose talking to them hasn’t worked?”

“Sadly no. But I guess… it is what it is. I guess everyone shows they care in different ways,” he said flicking a white servo in the air dismissively. He was incredibly elegant in most things he did, and this simple gesture was no different.

But that elegance came at a cost. This Starscream was constantly seen as fragile, cold, unreachable. He was different from his counterpart in many ways who was rugged, fiery, and quite approachable (if you could trust him not to turn your words against you). It seemed both Starscreams though had always struggled to be taken seriously.

“Were you two… involved?” Starscream suddenly asked, cutting into Skyfire’s thoughts.

Skyfire looked into the smaller mech’s blue optics, looking for what prompted this question. “Yes,” he replied, not sure he could hide this truth effectively. “Briefly. Before I was put under the ice, but after I had lost my memories,” he said trying to make sure the lie fell right off his glossa. 

Starscream nodded. “We… never really had that chat, did we?”

Skyfire felt his spark pulsing in his chamber. “We’re chatting right now?” he said weakly.

The aerial smiled. “Come with me,” he said, walking to a nearby balcony. Skyfire followed, noticing, not for the first time, that he and his counterpart _moved_ the same way through a crowd. It was both lithe and effortless, but the Starscream before him seemed much less in his element. He avoided touching anyone and would physically twist to avoid bumping into a mech, even accidentally. The black-helmed Starscream practically invited touch by comparison.

They got out onto the balcony looking out over the sands of the ruined Cybertron. It was dark now and both Skyfire and Starscream’s white plating glowed in the moonlight. 

“It pains me to see Cybertron reduced to dust,” Starscream said, his optics looking out over the distance. “Especially under the circumstances we found ourselves.”

“We are making such progress though. There may yet be a way to make it what it was.”

Starscream turned to him and gave him a soft look that melted him.

“You are so different from him, in all the best ways,” Starscream said quietly, his blue optics still looking at him. “I wish I had met this version of you earlier,” he murmured.

Skyfire carefully took a step closer, hoping not to scare or crowd the aerial, but he also wanted to be closer to him. “I wish I had met you earlier too. I feel that it would have spared you more pain.”

Starscream smiled sadly. “My pain is my raiment that I put on everyday to remind me that I am alive, despite what happened to me,” he said, his smile false and brittle.

Skyfire desperately wanted to hold the aerial, but he held back. He knew he did not like to be touched.

The aerial leaned his back against the railing of the balcony. “I find myself drawn to you, despite… everything. You are very kind, optimistic, and don’t enjoy the fighting that we must do, but you are still good at it. I think on the best of days Jetfire was similar to you, but his best days became more and more rare as time went on.”

Skyfire didn’t want to talk about Jetfire. His whole _life_ here on this side of the portal had been about his counterpart. Every day he found a new thing the other shuttle had managed to destroy without realizing its value.

Skyfire used the word hate sparingly in his life. He reserved it for mechs like the Megatron back home. Jetfire was quickly earning the same emotion in his spark.

“I imagine it is complicated for you when you see me,” Skyfire said finally. He leaned his forearms down on the balcony as well, bracing against the railing and looking out on the quiet landscape.

“Not as complicated as you might think,” Starscream replied. 

The aerial had leaned over and pressed his lips to Skyfire’s in a kiss.

The shuttle was surprised and froze to the spot. He was elated; the kiss was perfect and made him weak.

But to his surprise, he wasn’t sure that this was _everything_ he wanted.

There was a clearing of the vocalizer from someone behind them and Starscream pulled away, hastily, his faceplate flush. Skyfire gave him a soft smile, to try and reassure him as he looked bewildered and maybe even frightened by what he had just done. 

“Skyfire, we need you for a mission,” came the voice of Shockwave, his displeasure somewhat obvious in his tone.

“Oh, _really_ ,” Starscream said, finding his voice after a moment. It was thick and slightly bitter.

Shockwave nodded, his optic looking concerned. “Megatron has been wounded,” he said. 

“ _Where_?” the aerial breathed.

Shockwave shook his helm. “Starscream, you need to stay here. Skyfire, come with me, I will give you the coordinates he sent us. Time is of the essence.”

“I’ll go with him-”

“Starscream,” Shockwave said more sternly this time. “We need a single shuttle class bot to go in and retrieve him, while the rest of us distract the Autobots from finding him. Please trust me when I say you can’t go. We need you _here,”_ he said, trying to keep his vocalizer even.

Skyfire quickly met Shockwave to walk out. “I’m ready. Tell me where to go.”

Starscream watched them leave, his optics pained.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long wait yet again ;) But we got some major background in this story.
> 
> Jetfire is not a nice guy.

Starscream and Skywarp returned to the base after some time. Skywarp had been far too endearing for Starscream’s taste, but luckily the mech had offered friendship at least for the moment with no expectations of anything else. Looking at Skywarp eased his spark somehow, but Starscream knew he couldn’t afford to allow himself to become entangled or distracted. Skyfire was already proving to be too much of a distraction as it was.

His counterpart and Thundercracker were waiting for them when they returned with drawn looks on their faces.

“Skyfire had to leave on a mission,” Starscream explained. “He didn’t have time to wait to say goodbye.”

Was that a little bit of tightness he saw in his counterpart’s faceplate? Interesting.

At least Skyfire wouldn’t be a distraction for the time being. He just needed to stay close to his counterpart and Jetfire would eventually appear.

His spark sinking in his chest… had nothing to do with Skyfire.

He nodded as if he understood that Skyfire had other duties other than annoying him with… feelings. “When will he be back?”

There was a small glance that Thundercracker gave him, but it seemed to be from curiosity than anything else. “We aren’t sure,” he replied. “A week at least.”

That… was a long time. He was going to have to brush up on his skills for ingratiating himself into the ranks if he was going to survive.

Distantly though, he was relieved. Skyfire was away from his counterpart, and therefore not near where Jetfire would likely appear next. He was safe from relative harm. Getting him away from this Starscream was a… bonus.

He was being petty. Starscream felt like himself again.

“Come on,” Skywarp said to him. “I’ll get you to the barracks and settled in.” Starscream nodded, watching his counterpart poorly disguise his worry.

Yet another thing they had in common then.

* * *

Skyfire flew high above the clouds keeping his sensors on a wide sweep. The air up at these heights was refreshingly chilly and it gave him time to think.

What was he doing, kissing Starscream back? Actually? Truly? The mech was just confused, right? Confusing his feelings with Jetfire for some that he might have for Skyfire? Skyfire never should have allowed it to happen. There were too many complications involved. That Starscream was still hurting from Jetfire, and Skyfire was just a kinder version of his former lover.

But it was the same for Skyfire. This Starscream was a kinder, gentler version of his former lover as well. Maybe they could find solace in each other. They were allowed this much, right?

Except Skyfire was also still in love with his Starscream.

Actually, expressing the thought in his helm surprised him. It had come to him from out of his subconscious, and he hadn’t meant to actually crystallize the thought so clearly. But here he found himself in love with two versions of the same mech. They completed each other in some ways. One was challenging and adorably temperamental. The other was elegant and easily flustered. Somehow, they were both quintessentially Starscream.

He knew it was selfish to want them both. It probably couldn't happen.

For one thing, he knew the Starscream from his universe was a jealous mech. He was high-strung and devious, and he thought that those traits had only been exacerbated during their time apart. The other Starscream was similarly impatient when it came to drama and fools; it would take far more than he was likely willing to give to make a relationship work between them, if that was even what the other two would want. 

He had guessed that the Starscream from his universe was still interested in Skyfire though. Given his behavior, he seemed starved for affection. Had he not moved on from Skyfire during all this time?

Which brought up the question of Jetfire.

Where was Jetfire, exactly? Skyfire had believed he was hiding somewhere, or dead. But it was entirely possible he had gone to the other universe instead.

Had he met Starscream there? He needed more information, and he wished he could just pin his Starscream down and force the answers out of him. He wanted to help and Starscream was still holding back.

Was it that he didn’t trust Skyfire? Or was Starscream trying to protect him somehow?

He had very few answers, and questions mounting by the day. He jetted his engines a little harder as he got closer to the coordinates where Megatron was. He pinged an update to Shockwave who traveled below with a contingent of other Decepticons, planning to provide a distraction while Skyfire extracted Megatron from the field.

He hoped to get back soon so that he could begin to put these puzzle pieces together.

* * *

Over the next few days Starscream kept trying to find ways to be near his counterpart. He didn’t want to think of it as stalking, but he knew it was probably close. He had memorized his schedule, and had volunteered for duties that would put him in proximity to the white-helmed mech. It helped that Skywarp was willing to do anything he asked at this point.

Starscream felt bad if he was still leading on the purple aerial, but it had to be done. On one level he wanted to know what was so… appealing about the other Starscream, but he also had begun to feel a certain need to protect this version of himself. At least so one of them could be happy.

That’s how he found himself watching him after one of their weekly brief meetings.

Starscream narrowed his optics, watching his counterpart carefully. There was just something wrong about him: the way he laughed, the way he allowed mechs to lightly touch him on the shoulder, on the wrist, on the wing. Starscream saw aerial tense at the contact, but he allowed it anyway. He was all smiles and grins, nods and encouragement.

Starscream could see that he hated it.

Maybe he was projecting. This Starscream was not him. Maybe he was a bubbly mech of starshine and prisms. If Starscream examined himself, he knew he was not like this. He could talk to mechs, sure. He could even convince them to do things. He enjoyed the attention. It looked like his counterpart might collapse from the weight.

It occurred to him also that they treated him like some kind of saint. Or maybe not a saint, per se, but a stained-glass window of one. Distant, modeled, and somehow above everything. But also fragile.

Once the small crowd left the aerial, he looked like he sagged a little. This was always the time Starscream felt was best to strike.

He strode purposefully across the room and came into step beside his counterpart as he walked towards his lab. The white-helmed mech looked at him with some mild curiosity. “Can I… help you?”

Starscream nodded. “Yes. Why do all these mechs treat you like you are made of glass?”

His counterpart blinked at the bluntness. He kind of made an incredulous laugh and stopped walking down the corridor, facing Starscream with a confused gaze. “I… don’t know what you are talking about,” he said, slowly, gauging.

Starscream folded his arms across his chassis. “Wow, you are a terrible liar,” he said with a smirk.

His counterpart drew back at that. His optics searched the faceplate that matched his. “Riight, well, I’ll just be going then…”

Starscream followed him, unperturbed. “It strikes me that you are second-in-command of the Decepticon faction and could have anything you want, but you choose to let others decide for you.”

His counterpart’s wings flared out, betraying his annoyance. “How do you know I don’t have everything I want?” he said over his shoulder.

Starscream felt the phrase come out of his mouth, unbidden. “Because you look how I feel.”

His counterpart froze. He slowly turned around, as if seeing Starscream for the first time. Starscream smirked in response. “Let’s refuel together, shall we?” Starscream stepped forward and intertwined his arm with his opposite, locking at the elbow. The other mech was a little shocked at the familiarity but allowed himself to be led away.

Starscream found a small alcove of the base that had a window that looked out onto Cybertron. Starscream had actually found this spot before and had noted that no one came here; it was far away from the more populated areas. It was also high up and on a balcony terrace. You could see anyone coming far before they could be within earshot of you.

He took a seat, and the other Starscream did the same, however wary.

He found himself quite taken with his opposite. The Starscream of this universe was truly, magnetically lovely. He was grace and polish, and pleasantly unaware of it. Not like himself. He was screech and danger in an anxious and temperamental package. He saw the draw of this mech, especially when compared to himself.

But he was doing nothing with it. Starscream found himself wondering why.

“What is it you want that you don’t have?” his counterpart asked, his wide wings settling.

Starscream smiled, trying to keep it looking friendly rather than predatory. “I seek glory, I suppose,” he said tilting his helm. “Not a very ‘Decepticon’ sentiment I’m sure, but it’s true nonetheless.”

The blue optics narrowed slightly. “I think that was one of the first statements of yourself that you’ve ever said that was actually true.”

Starscream hated telling the truth. It was so much effort, and no one ever believed him. “You’ve figured me out so quickly.” He rested his chin into his servo and leaned onto his elbow on the table between them. “But again, it is you I am trying to understand. They treat you as if you are going to break but don’t seem to know that they are driving you there themselves. I thought Decepticons were more attuned to… emotions than that.”

The aerial flicked his optics down to the table, as if weighing some things. “I’m surprised someone hasn’t already tried to tell you my story,” he said with a touch of bitterness.

“Even if they had tried, I would like to hear it from you.”

The aerial was clearly bewildered by all of this, but he too must feel the strange familiarity it was to be looking at your mirrored opposite. He relaxed and watched Starscream for a few more moments before clearing his vocalizer. “It starts off like a bad joke,” he began, his blue optics flicking down to the energon that Starscream was pulling out of subspace.

“A librarian, a scientist, and a mathematician walk into a bar…and end up becoming good friends. They talk about opening new universities and programs for students and advanced learning. They plan for the future, all laughs and smiles, incredible hope and excitement about what they could accomplish together.

“Slowly though, the librarian became more interested in religious studies and the occult, and the mathematician stopped coming to their get-togethers. The scientist tried to keep the dialogue open, but the librarian was radicalizing faster than he could keep up, and the mathematician was unreachable.

“Their names were Optronix, Starscream, and Megatron, respectively.”

Starscream couldn’t quite hide the shock in his optics fast enough. He could guess who Optronix was.

“Optronix really changed,” the aerial said with regret, looking out the window. “He became oddly paranoid and distrustful, especially if the subject of Megatron ever came up. I think he felt rejected by his old friend, and I couldn’t find the words to help soothe him. I did try though,” he said sadly.

“But when the Matrix chose him, he had the words of the former Primes singing in his audials, and he was truly gone. Optimus Prime emerged in his place, righteously right, horribly twisted, and ready to burn the world to save it. He started to destroy everything we had worked for on Cybertron and then took to razing city-states that opposed him.

“Megatron finally remerged with a plan to stand against him. I was caught in the middle of two of my best and oldest friends. I tried to remain neutral as long as possible. Prime forced my servo.”

He took a sip of his energon then, swallowing slowly. He then put the drink down and ran his digits along the lip of the cube. “I was captured by the more zealous of his followers, but my old connection to Prime saved me from worse treatment I suppose. Prime finally met with me, and he asked me to join him. To restore Cybertron to its former glory by destroying anyone that would oppose him. I refused, and he burned my city-state to the ground as a reward.”

He paused here to lock optics with Starscream. “He made me watch it burn,” he said quietly.

Starscream unwaveringly met his optics back. 

His counterpart's lip twitched a little. "You don’t pity me. Everyone pities me; why don’t you?"

"Do you want to be pitied?"

"No,” the white-helmed mech replied. “I want to be _commended_. I watched everything I knew and loved go up in flames, and I’m still _here_. I didn’t fall apart.” 

Starscream’s mouth curved into a delighted smile. It seemed his counterpart _did_ have some similar personality quirks under his beautiful veneer. Starscream took a certain narcissistic glee at the mech’s words. This Starscream _was_ strong and deserved better than what he had received. “And you _should_ be commended. I’m sure lesser mechs would have fallen under the weight.” 

His counterpart softened a little. “I almost did. But you are right. I am not a lesser mech.” His wings fanned out a little at his shoulders.

It appeared he did have a little bit of pride. Starscream felt kinship in him for the first time, and he was happy for it.

“But it wasn’t over,” he continued. His wings fell slowly, and his face grew… distant. “It took some time, but eventually I was rescued from my captivity with the Autobots. I immediately joined Megatron in developing new ways to outsmart the Autobots, and we came up with something that gave us a little bit of an edge. I helped develop combiner technology with the help of Jetfire.”

Starscream tried to suppress the stiffness in his frame. Tension radiated down his neck and back.

“Jetfire and I were involved. He really did mean a lot to me. I wanted nothing more than to fall back into the routines we had before the war, where I looked to him for guidance, and I didn’t have to think about anything. I could relax and he would take care of me.

“But when I came back from my time in captivity with the Autobots, I noticed he had… changed. Or maybe he didn’t. Maybe I had changed and allowed him freer reign. He became more possessive, harsher, more critical. He became rougher. Slowly over time, he alienated me from my friends and trine. 

“I believed him, all the things he said to me. I didn’t deserve to be in the light. I was too broken to amount to anything and I didn’t need to be part of Megatron’s movement. He and I could work in our private little lab and wait out the war together selling our work to the highest bidder, be it Autobot or Decepticon. 

“No one else would ever love me. I didn’t need to bring others down with my trauma. He would take care of me, and that’s all I needed.”

He paused here, and Starscream suppressed a need to shift in his seat. This all sounded far too familiar, and as much as it made him uncomfortable, another part of him was straining to hear the next part. 

“… why is this easy to tell you?” his counterpart asked, looking confused. “I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone all of this so… bluntly.”

Starscream’s jaw hardened a little.

“You met him, didn’t you?”

“You mean Skyfire?” Starscream said weakly. It sounded like a lame attempt to distract even to his own audials.

“No, I do not mean Skyfire,” his counterpart said. His blue optics were like ice, raking across Starscream’s spark. As sharp as they were, they were also inviting. “We both know that Skyfire is a different mech.”

Starscream wanted to unpack that statement to figure out what the aerial had guessed or had assumed. Maybe he was just talking metaphorically. But… he was not about to underestimate this Starscream ever again.  
  
“We aren’t talking about me right now,” Starscream said after a few moments. His red optics looked down into his own energon. “What happened next?”

“He left,” his counterpart replied simply. “He stole all of our research- MY research. Took it to the Autobots and the Decepticons lost whatever tiny lead they might have enjoyed. And I realized I wasn’t as broken as Jetfire had convinced me I was. I pulled myself together and brought whatever I had left to Megatron. He accepted me back into the fold without question, and I’ve spent the rest of my time proving to myself that I deserve to be here.”

Starscream turned his gaze to look out the window, calculating this new information. Jetfire seemed to have everything he wanted: this version of Starscream presumably under his complete control, power, a position where he could dictate the terms. But he had thrown it all away almost at the flip of a switch. Not terribly different from when he had left the Decepticons in his home universe.

His wrist ached where it had been severed from his body.  
  
When he looked back at his counterpart, he saw the same calculating look staring back at him. 

Starscream gave him a small smile. “Thank you for telling me your story. I realize you really have no reason to trust me, but… you can. I promise.” He was surprised at the sincerity of his own words. Maybe he did actually mean what he said.

“I would like to hear yours as well. Seems only fair,” the aerial replied, taking another sip of his energon. “Specifically, how you know Jetfire,” he added, the taut strain evident in his vocal cords.

It would not be terribly prudent to tell this Starscream this story. If Skyfire did return before he could deal with Jetfire and leave, then it was possible that they would talk, and it would be brought up. Starscream didn’t really ever intend to tell Skyfire what had happened in his absence in the other universe, especially if Skyfire did not intend to return.

Still. Starscream didn’t always do the most logical thing.

“I met Jetfire a long time ago. Probably not long after he left… you, I imagine. And I’m afraid I didn’t know you existed. I wish I had. But now that I see you and understand who you were to him… I believe I was your replacement. And I was a poor substitute,” he said with a bitter laugh. His counterpart had stilled and was watching him with extreme concern.

It was not, however, pity.  
  
“I am not as graceful or nearly as forgiving as you are. I believed Jetfire was somebody else.” He tried not to laugh at his own joke. It wasn’t very funny.  
  
“I thought he was like a friend to me,” he continued. “I believed him. I sought his praise, his affection. But I am not you. I couldn’t live up to your standard. And if I am honest, I prefer shadow and the dark. I lie, often just for the sake of doing so. I’m a hedonist. I’m selfish. 

“Jetfire was disgusted by me. He kept trying to change me, he wanted me to be demure, he wanted me to be quiet unless spoken too. He tried to make me into a crystal gardener.

“I now see why.”

The aerial’s optics looked pained. Starscream wasn’t sure it was because of his words or if there was something in his expression, he wasn’t quite able to mask.  
  
“He kept trying to convince me to take up the gardening. He thought it would develop the patience I lacked and needed to be your copy.” He stopped and lifted is energon cube in a mock toast. “I shattered every rose I ever touched,” he muttered before sipping his energon.  
  
“He wanted me to change my frame,” he continued. “He actually hired a surgeon that would make the changes. He tried to convince me it was time to upgrade, and what he chose was almost exactly yours. I almost did it; I wanted him to be _happy,_ you understand. And I would have done it. At that time, I would have done anything he asked.  
  
“But something stopped me. I paid the surgeon to let me sneak out the back door. He was _so_ angry, Starscream, and I certainly paid for that change of… ember.

“But I managed to survive with him, until he abandoned me as well. And like you I was then able to understand what he was, and what he had done to me.

“But not before he had murdered my trinemate.”

“WHAT?!” the other Starscream said, his wings flaring. His optics were terrible blue chips of ice, forbidding and _incensed_. But just as quickly as the anger flared, it was abating. Too soon, Starscream thought. He was giving in to sadness too soon. His wings fell and he looked despondent.

“I can see it in your face. You would like to take on this burden too; hurt yourself as if it was your fault Jetfire did this. Something like because you couldn’t allow yourself to sacrifice your own happiness for him, my trinemate suffered the consequences.” Starscream’s red optics blazed angrily.  
  
“But it’s not your burden to bear. It’s mine. You cannot have it.”

They regarded each other for a few kliks, both of them raw and emotional.  
  
His counterpart downed the rest of his energon before standing. “Come on, we’re going to get something stronger than this.” He gave Starscream a wink.

Starscream smiled and also rose, following him down the corridor.


	10. Chapter 10

Over the next few days, Starscream grew to like Starshatter. He was definitely rough around the edges, and Starscream could tell he was holding back a lot of his more biting humor and comments, but the brightly colored aerial was very much an asset to them.

His flying was phenomenal. He also had an incredible grasp of some fighting techniques that even Starscream had trouble keeping up with. When they sparred, it almost always ended in a draw with Starscream’s wing sword on Starshatter’s throat, but Starshatter’s null-ray pointed at his abdomen.

They found plenty to talk about too, other than Jetfire.

It seems that Starshatter did have some inclination to science as well, though not nearly to the depth Starscream had. At least… so he thought. It appeared that much of Starshatter’s experience was more centered around exploration and weapons development, rather than mechanical engineering, but he was still a delightful conversation partner. He was very opinionated and arrogant, but also exceedingly curious which made their conversations deep.

It had occurred to him that Starshatter was deliberately trying to craft a certain persona of himself, and it was not necessarily who he actually  _ was _ . But given what he knew about how Jetfire had treated him (and  _ that _ at the very least had smacked of terrible, awful truth), he decided he could afford his quirks.

He still couldn’t figure out if Starshatter wanted to date his trinemate or not. He would stiffen every time Skywarp would enter the same vicinity as him, and he would then make every effort to be inordinately kind to him. It was cute until Skywarp tried to return the kindness with his typical bluntness, and practically propositioned Starshatter in front of everyone. Starshatter would smile wistfully and very politely ( _ oddly) _ turn him down and try to keep talking about other things.

Skywarp was growing incredibly confused, the poor mech. Starscream and Thundercracker told him to leave him alone and find some other wings to chase.

The only other odd thing about Starshatter was how he acted when Skyfire’s name had come up. He would freeze, look away, become incredibly distant, and then change the subject. Starscream had guessed that the mech was not entirely over whatever they had shared, and Starscream didn’t fault him for it. Though it was interesting that Starshatter did not seem to have the same conflicting problems that Starscream had in conflating Jetfire and Skyfire.

Which lent to him a lot of… theories about Skyfire.

“Why do you keep asking about him?” Starshatter asked, amused. To many other mechs he would sound annoyed, but Starscream had figured out that it was just his way of talking. Or, interestingly, maybe Starshatter actually liked Starscream’s company too and it had actually soothed his abrasive personality. They were in Starscream’s lab looking at some metal samples from deep within the core of Cybertron to see if any of their efforts in reinvigorating the planet were working.

“Do I?” Starscream laughed. “I’m sorry.” He set down his sample and turned to the other mech with a small smile. “It’s just… I’ve known him for a long time, but somehow I think you know him better than me.” Starshatter didn’t look away from the eyepiece of his microscope, but he also was clearly not looking at the sample anymore. “Granted, during that time I purposely kept myself distant from him as best I could. He was often at other bases and on other missions, so I only saw him occasionally until recently.”

Starshatter pursed his lips and finally pulled away from the microscope, meeting Starscream’s optics. There was that carefully manufactured neutral look that he often had when he didn’t like the topic of conversation but was struggling to remain polite. “I… think you are trying to ask me something.” He waited expectantly. 

“Well,” Starscream started, starting to lose his nerve. “I really like Skyfire. I hope that’s okay.”

Starshatter’s optics softened slightly. “Of course. Our chapter closed a while ago.” He turned back to his sample as if the question hadn’t come up.

Starscream wasn’t sure he quite believed him, but he also understood the need to take him at his word. “I know I don’t need your approval, but I appreciate it all the same. I am coming to value your friendship and I don’t want anything between Skyfire and I to harm you.”

Starshatter furrowed his brow, but again with more amusement than anything else looking back at him. “You trust too easily, it seems,” he murmured. “I’m not surprised you like him. He’s very similar to you. Seems like a good match to me.”

“I agree… mostly.”

Starshatter narrowed his optics. “Mostly?”

Starscream sighed. He  _ did  _ trust too easily, perhaps, and though he had tried to keep himself walled off for so long after everything that had happened, he still found friends in the most unlikely of mechs. “Skyfire doesn’t challenge me like Jetfire did. He accepts me for who I am, not who I could be. And though I really appreciate it, I kind of wonder…”

Starshatter tilted his helm down in thought. Starscream recognized it as something he would often do himself, but… in a different way, maybe. It was odd looking at Starshatter who was so similar to him but so different at the same time. Then he replied, “But did Jetfire actually challenge you? Or did you just feel challenged in his presence?”

This was not the response he expected. “What do you mean?”

“Jetfire is incredibly intelligent, clever, and cunning but you might be giving him too much credit. As smart as he is, he didn’t always have your best interests at heart, and challenging you was never really part of his agenda. He was looking out for himself, his own desires, his own pursuits. So, if you felt challenged, that was something… intrinsic. Something you realized needed to improve while you were around him. And I can understand why.”

Starscream was stricken by the words. He had thought Skyfire was lacking in some way but hadn’t considered that maybe it was he who was lacking some kind of component. He shouldn’t rely on Skyfire to challenge him; he should do it himself  _ for _ himself. Something in his face must have shown, because Starshatter reached out a servo and placed it on his shoulder.

“Listen. Skyfire is smitten with you. You are just his… type. If you want to be happy, you could be happy with him.” He smiled with rare warmth. “I promise you.”

Starscream smiled back, glad that his new friend was being so genuine with him.

“I hope I’m not interrupting,” came Skyfire’s booming voice. Starscream couldn’t help but grin wildly.

“You’re back!” he said happily, standing from the desk. Starshatter similarly stood, watching with a slight smile. “How is Megatron?”

Skyfire smiled back fondly. “He’s alive but wounded. He’s in the medbay; I can take you to him.”

Starscream nodded, his wings twitching with excitement. He turned to Starshatter. “You should come with us; I’d love for you to meet Megatron.”

Starshatter smirked. “Megatron, hmm? Should be… interesting,” he said with an odd tone. He looked to Skyfire with an odd glint to his optic.

Skyfire… barely gave him a glance.

“Megatron is currently unconscious, so maybe you should wait before bringing new visitors? Just a thought,” Skyfire said with an affable shrug.

Starscream agreed, however much he wanted to disagree. He wanted Megatron to meet this enigmatic mech as soon as possible to get his take on him. He looked to Starshatter who had that neutral look on his face again. “Maybe another time?”

Starshatter was just staring at Skyfire, almost as if he hadn’t heard Starscream’s question. Slowly his lips turned up into a smirk. “Of course. Another time, then.”

Starscream started walking out towards the medbay and Skyfire was following close behind. “I’m glad you made it back,” he said.

“I’m glad to  _ be  _ back,” Skyfire said lowly. “And I’m glad to see… you.”

Starscream turned to look over his shoulder and gave the mech a soft look. Skyfire was looking at him with an odd intensity that made the energon in his lines move quicker and his faceplate heated a little. 

But as he turned, he saw a blur of wings and scarlet running up behind Skyfire. Starshatter had some kind of improvised weapon made out of a pipe from the lab and was wielding it, preparing to strike. In his shock, Starscream’s vocalizer cut out into frenzied static. Skyfire had seen his look and whipped around just as Starshatter had raised his weapon.

Skyfire met Starshatter’s weapon with an embedded energy blade from the top of his wrist.

“I  _ knew _ you’d be back,” Starshatter growled, smiling wickedly. “I just had to  _ wait _ !” He pushed harder against the blade, actually making Skyfire take a step back.

“I don’t know what you are talking about! What’s wrong with you?!” Skyfire said, throwing some fear into his voice. Starshatter was pushing harder against the pipe, baring his fanged denta.

Skyfire’s voice sounded wrong. Fake.

No.

“Starscream, go get security! This mech isn’t who you think he is!” Skyfire said, turning back to look at him. Starscream felt something twist in his ember, something that froze him to the spot, something that stopped his vents.

“When… did you get the sword mod?” Starscream asked weakly. His chest felt tight and he had to still his servos from trembling.

“What?” Skyfire asked, incensed. “Right before I left!”

Starshatter grinned maliciously. “Skyfire would never have gotten that mod, you imbecile.” He pushed harder with his pipe and managed to bat away the sword that was in front of him.

Skyfire jumped back away from Skyshatter, his struts looking tense and ready to defend himself. He stole a look back at Starscream. His optics were wild and angry.

Then he slowly relaxed.

_ No. Primus, no. It couldn’t be him. No. No. _

“I was hoping I had more time,” came his voice. It was amused and deep, and Skyfire’s but… not. “I should have guessed you would come and mess everything up for me,” he said, turning his gaze to Starshatter.

“ _ I _ messed everything up?!” Starshatter shrieked. “You piece of  _ slag _ , you’re the one who-”

“Starshatter, what is going  _ on _ ?! _ ”  _ Starscream said, his vocalizer cracking. He looked wildly between the two of them trying to make sense of the situation but getting nothing. But at the same time… his ember was flaring harshly in his chest.

The white mech laughed, and it was a horrible, scathing laugh that reverberated in his audials. He knew that laugh. “Star _ shatter _ ?! Oh, my poor Starscream,” he said, looking to him with pity. “Is  _ everyone  _ around you lying to you? Is that your fate, my love?”

Starscream couldn’t vent. He took a step back as his wings flared.

“But I  _ am _ surprised you didn’t guess, considering how the resemblance is uncanny,” he continued, ignoring Starscream’s reaction.

Starshatter launched forward with a snarl and began fighting with the other mech, using his pipe to ward off the blows from the sword. He appeared he wasn’t nearly as gifted with close quarters fighting as the other, bigger mech. Still, he was a terror, and they were fighting viciously in an almost practiced dance.

The mech was just laughing.

Starscream commed for his trine and for additional security who responded that they would be there soon. He then took another step back, unease twisting in his ember. The other mech got in a good punch, sending Starshatter flying and impacting against the wall, temporarily stunned.

He turned to Starscream, his face twisted into a cruel smirk.

“Did you… get your memories back?” Starscream asked brokenly. Was Skyfire actually gone now? And… in his place…

The mech barked another laugh. “ _ Memories? _ Oh, the lies never cease!” He started to walk towards Starscream. “Just remember:  _ I _ never lied to you.”

Starshatter had stood up, shaking his helm, coming out of being stunned. “Oh, but your paint job and optics? That wasn’t a lie?” He launched himself with another growl, swinging a punch.

The giant mech smirked. “Oh. That was me lying to  _ you _ . That’s different.”

Starshatter shrieked and scraped his claws across his white plating. The mech growled in response and his smirk became a grimace as some energon welled in the wounds. “You are  _ so _ annoying!” he bellowed, swiping with his sword.

Starshatter barely dodged it in time.

Starscream decided he’d had enough. He dove in to try and attack the big white mech, but Starshatter roughly pushed him to the side. 

“Stay  _ out of this _ !” he hissed angrily.

“Stay out of  _ what?! _ What  _ is this?!” _

Then several things happened all at once.

The other mech came up behind Starshatter, poised to strike him in the back with his blade. Starshatter sensed the movement and turned, his optics going wide and his servos went up to brace the blow. From the end of the corridor, Skywarp had appeared and was now running down the hallway shouting. Starshatter turned toward him with a fearful look on his face.

And the energon blade slid into Starshatter’s abdomen.

Starscream froze to the spot. “ _ No _ ,” he breathed.

The giant white mech reeled back, looking surprised. He looked up and saw Skywarp running down the hallway and then pulled out his sword from Starshatter’s cockpit, earning a keening whine from the wounded aerial. As Starshatter began to fall to the ground with a pained gasp, the mech grabbed him and held him, his faceplate full of something like shock and… maybe fear.

The white mech unsubpaced a blaster and fired at a control panel in the hallway, activating an emergency blast door. It came down from the ceiling on both sides of them, effectively blocking Skywarp and anyone else from reaching them. He then looked down at the mech in his arms. Starshatter wasn’t struggling.

“I didn’t actually want to kill you, if you can believe me. But you just keep getting in the way, darling.” He gently put a servo on Starshatter’s cheek. 

Starshatter opened his mouth to reply but his original reply was lost in a grimace. His red optics glared at the mech and he managed to ground out:

“Let him go, Jetfire.”

Hearing the name aloud finally made Starscream stop pretending that this was just some random mech that looked like Skyfire. Starshatter had been expecting him, apparently. Starscream hadn’t been able to allow his processor to think that it was possible.

Jetfire sighed. 

“No,” he said, raising his fake blue optics to look at Starscream. “I think I will just take you both with me.” Energon was flowing freely out of Starshatter’s wound and Jetfire frowned as he pressed his servo into the wound to try and stop it. Starshatter hissed and glared but was too weak to protest more.

Starscream looked down at the bleeding mech, his optics pained.

“He’s going to bleed out soon, Starscream.” Jetfire’s optics hardened. “Together we can save his life. But you have to come with me.”

Starscream looked up and glared. “To what end, Jetfire? We’re doing this? Again?” He tried to keep as much emotion out of his voice as he could, but his ember was flaring painfully and he knew he was still in the dark about the full situation. It was like standing on the edge of a cliff and he was just waiting for someone to push him off.

“I just want to… talk. Explain. Get you to understand,” Jetfire said, hefting Starshatter’s frame into his arms and lifting him off the ground. Starshatter looked like he was close to passing out, but his red optics were locked on Starscream, angry that he was even considering agreeing to Jetfire’s deal.

“You’re getting what you want, okay? You get to save his life. All I want is a simple conversation.”

But words from Jetfire were dangerous; never innocuous and never simple.

Starscream sighed and gave the barest of nods.

Jetfire smiled softly and turned to go through a door behind them. He strode over to the far end of the room and kicked through a window, the glass shattering around him and he jumped into the air.

Starscream hesitated only a moment more and jumped out behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ 
> 
> I have a bunch of comments still to respond to but feel free to keep yelling at me :D <3 (I like it). Thank you Raax for giving it a look over ;) <3


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